Journal entry by Jill Fouch



I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving with your families and friends.  Most importantly, I hope you made treasured memories.  Our Thanksgiving was very low key this year.  Our goal was to be home and rest.  We did venture out to cut down our tree the Wednesday before Thanksgiving.  Yup, we were the crazy family in the pouring rain picking out a tree to cut down.  I will say, we made record time picking just the right tree.  No one got upset that “their tree” wasn’t the one, and everyone worked together to cut, haul and load the tree into the truck!  Now that is a Christmas miracle in itself!!   My guess is the rain and wind helped us out with such peace and calmness at the tree farm.  


Monday night Matt and I left for Houston for our scheduled appointment at MD Anderson.  Matt started Tuesday at 6:00 am with tests and scans, and then the waiting game started.  We both got some much needed sleep, have I mentioned how wonderful naps are?  We didn’t venture out at all, never left the hotel and hospital. (The hospital is connected to the hotel)  Wednesday we had our appointment with our oncologist and then we met with the clinical trial doctor and his team.  Prior to our departure we spent time praying and asking for peace in the plan that God had for us.  I will say we were both at peace going into our appointment with Dr. Johnson.  We learned that Matt’s treatment we were so hopeful about 7 weeks ago, isn’t working.  The cancer in his body has progressed in previously diseased areas as well as metastasized to his lower spine and pelvic bones.  This is definitely heartbreaking for all of us.  We are sad but determined to keep our faith that the plan for us is greater than the pain.  I had a friend that has gone through great heartache herself, text me something that is important when we were talking about how difficult this is for our kids.  She said we can’t control the situation, but we can control how we respond.  That is exactly what we will do, we will respond by continuing  to pray and keep our faith as we look at what’s next.  Matt is tired and achy, but a fighter.  He lives with nausea and fatigue everyday, but brushes it off.  You will be glad to know he hasn’t lost his dad humor, love of sports and the drive to be present for the kids and I.


We have continued to be given signs that we are not alone on this journey.  Last February Matt was very sick, and we were given hope and time.  This time our room when we met with Dr. Johnson in was the #23.  This is a special number for our family for two reasons.  Colossians 3:23 and Psalm 23.  We were able to book a late night flight home on Wednesday night so we could be home with our kids.  The switch from Thursday to Wednesday night was so easy and we were able to get two of the four remaining seats on the plane.  While we waited for our flight in Houston, I met a wonderful woman, Debra.  Debra and I talked for quite awhile.  She shared that she had lost her son just days before his 18th birthday.  She gave me some comforting words and how her faith kept her going when life seemed so painful. Debra just happened to be  our head flight attendant to Chicago.  She must have shared our story with the other four attendants because they were so kind and couldn’t do enough to make us comfortable.  What a blessing, we were both emotionally and physically exhausted and were just trying to keep ourselves together.  There was something comforting about someone knowing and understanding the sadness we were experiencing on our flight home. The kids were so happy to wake up this morning and find us home.  


We haven’t ended our game, we haven’t given up and we will still keep fighting for a win here on earth.  We also know that that we aren’t calling the plays, God has the final  say on how things are called.  Either way, victory will be found.  We have no idea how many minutes are left on the clock, none of us do, which is the most difficult part.  Miracles do happen, we are still asking for one, but also know the realities that may be ahead.  I just want to make the most out of the time we have together.  Matt, the kids and I are looking forward to events on the calendar and will see each event as a celebration.  So as I close this update, I challenge you this season to look out for one another, your family members, your friends, your neighbors, your enemies, the person you do not know.  Celebrate life’s little moments and keep cheering and praying for our Team Fouch.


Love to all,

Team Fouch



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