Lisa was doing so well Tuesday morning that I left the hospital before noon thinking I would come home and work the rest of the afternoon while Lisa continued to improve and was moving towards being discharged.  At 2:35 in the afternoon Lisa’s mom called me and I heard Lisa in the background saying “just tell Blaine I need him”.   I hung up the phone and was at the hospital in probably 12 minutes.  That’s the fastest I’ve ever driven on I-77, thankfully there were no police on the interstate between Cornelius and Huntersville at that point in time…

When I got to the hospital Lisa was in the room with her Mom and Hope.  Her breathing was labored, and she was in severe pain.  I wasn’t there for more than 5 minutes and Lisa wanted to go to the bathroom.   Once we got into the bathroom Lisa just wanted to lay on the floor.  Her breathing continued to be very irregular and the hyperventilating continued.  She asked her Mom and Hope to leave the room.  She told me she didn’t want either of them to see her pass.  While she was laying on the floor in my arms she said “This is it… I’m dying”.  That moment seemed like it was hours, yet only seconds, all at the same time.  Soon her room was filled with doctors and nurses, all assuming that Lisa had fallen.  I had to tell them all that she was on the floor on purpose.  We were eventually able to slow down her breathing, she stopped sweating, and she got back in the hospital bed.  

From there forward Lisa was very active and alert.  They upped her pain medicine some and sent her for a CT Scan.  Lisa remained relatively active and alert until about 8:30 pm and we were in almost constant conversation.  Kirstyn came to see her Tuesday evening, and we had another bathroom episode.  This time she was just throwing up a little, but she didn’t want Kirstyn to see her do that.  From 8:30pm Tuesday until 2:20am Wednesday morning Lisa seemed to be getting worse, however she was still up and down from the hospital bed to the bathroom about every 30 minutes.  I read the results of her CT Scan sometime Tuesday evening and I knew what was happening in her abdomen, stomach, and esophagus…. The cancer was doing what we knew one day it would do unless Lisa was granted that miracle we had been praying for.  

The last conversations I had with Lisa in the early morning hours of Wednesday ranged from her saying “we need to check out funeral homes when I get discharged”, to “you need to talk to Mary” (I had no idea who Mary was, but read on and you’ll learn just like I did), to conversations where I am convinced she was seeing herself as a young girl, specifically asking about the young girl that was hyperventilating.

From 2:20am until 10:30am on Wednesday Lisa was incredibly peaceful.  Steady breathing, but not responsive.  I was with Lisa until about 8:00am Wednesday morning in the hospital room, and some of that time actually in the hospital bed with Lisa.  I’m so glad I made the decision to stay with her Tuesday night!  

Lisa’s Mom came to relieve me around 8:00am on Wednesday, so I went home and showered, and then right back to the hospital.  I had a 9:00am appointment with Hospice about Lisa’s palliative care options and plans.  The hospice representative, Mary, was the first to tell me that she wouldn’t recommend we try to bring Lisa home, she thought Lisa only had a couple of days left, and didn’t think Lisa would make it through a transport.  After asking why I couldn’t just take Lisa home in our SUV, my very next thought was the only place worse than the hospital for Lisa to pass would be in an ambulance.

My next conversation, almost immediately following the conversation with Mary from Hospice, was with Terry from the Novant Palliative care team.  She shared almost the exact same message with me about Lisa that Mary had shared.  I wasn’t giving up on getting Lisa home until I talked to both the hospital doctor and the oncologist.

Lisa’s breathing started to get very labored and watery around 11:00am.  A few minutes after that started Lisa’s mom went home to take a nap.  After Lisa’s mom left Lisa’s breathing started to return towards normal, but she never reached that completely peaceful stage.  A few minutes later the hospital doctor came to see me and he reiterated the same thing that both Mary and Terry shared about Lisa’s condition, and the that there was just too much risk in trying to transport Lisa.

Jonathan and Hope came to the hospital around 11:45am, and Lisa’s breathing returned to the labored and watery cadence. We all stayed in the room for a few minutes and then I pulled Jonathan into the hallway to tell him what I had learned that morning.  About 10 minutes later Jonathan and I came back into the room.  The three of us were there for several more minutes and then I pulled Hope out of the hospital room to share the same information I had shared with Jonathan.  Hope and I talked for probably 10 minutes, and when I walked back into the hospital room about 12:15pm I thought I could still see a couple of light breaths in Lisa’s lungs.  The nurse came in moments later and I asked if Lisa was still breathing, the nurse said she thought that Lisa had passed.  Another nurse confirmed, and finally a doctor as well.  I’ll never know if Lisa passed completely before I came back into the room, or if she was still passing when I sat down next to her.

Upon reflection, Lisa had the strength to make sure she had seen all of our immediate family, and made sure neither her mother nor Hope saw her pass.  What strength, she was such a fighter, even right up to the end!

Please continue to pray for all of Lisa’s family.  Our hearts are broken and we miss her terribly!  We know she is in the arms of Jesus and no longer in pain or suffering, but we are still heartbroken over the loss of Lisa’s physical presence.

I can’t thank you all enough for the amazing support and love you have shared with Lisa and our entire family during this journey.

🙏🏻💔🙏🏻❤️🙏🏻