I agree: it's not your time yet. Get some rest, do the things that fill you up, and then gather your knickers up and get your battle on. Knock this thing down again. With what sounds like two very intelligent women by your side, hopefully the battle itself won't knock you out for long after you've succeeded. We're all sending you spiritual comrades in arms (and lots of love energy). <3
Wow, YES! The MORE!!!! Facing that same issue right now. And Dang, so sorry for the spots which I want to imagine are just the rocks in your head that have chipped off into a few bits of gravel, right, from all this incessant knocking around! Wish it could be easier for you.
You are loved, you are loved, you are love and we by holding each others hands...maybe a bridge thru fear? xoxoxoxoxooxooxox