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September
18
2019

September 18, 2019

“To pray ’thy will be done’, I must be willing, if the answer requires it, that my will be undone”

Elizabeth Elliott

Hello All,

Its hard to believe that we have been on this path for 8 months now. Is some ways it feels much longer and in others much much shorter. Medically and spiritually, we knew when Jon was diagnosed the type of battle in which we were engaged and the likely outcomes. This week we decided that it was time to change focus. Jonathan is no longer going through chemo or any other kind of “treatment”. He has been referred to hospice and we will be having the initial hospice meeting tomorrow morning. In the meantime, Jonathan is choosing to spend his time focusing on his family and friends and enjoying the days ahead. It was a difficult decision, agonizing might be a better word, but it feels right and we are at peace. The key is that the battle was never about beating cancer and the hope was never in a physical cure. The battle has always been walking out the journey we have each been given with integrity and grace and the hope will always be in what comes after this world.

When we started this process we felt led to 2 Corinthians 12:9 But He said to me “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is perfected in weakness”. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly in my weakness so that the power of Christ may rest on me.  Our weakness may now be more pronounced but that means that so is God’s power. For that reason, and that reason alone,  we can continue to say “Bring it On”. If you are one of our friends who pray, please pray along side us that we can walk that out boldly in the weeks and months to come so that others will see the truth of that scripture and the God to whom it points.

We are so thankful for your prayers and support.

The Gore Family

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August
3
2019

August 3, 2019

Turns out I am getting worse at updating this site and not better :) We have been busy since May.... I don't really even know why I keep writing that. We have been busy since we got married in 1993 and especially since 1997 when we began having kids....

We started off the summer in June,with great scan results (no new growth anywhere and lots of shrinking of the metastatic lung spots) and Jon took a few weeks off from chemo. We were able to go play in Palm Springs and he spent some time with his family. Ethan and Nate went on a mission trip and then Ethan spent 3 weeks at Camp Lakeview. In the middle of that Jonathan, got a new toy (see below). Nothing like riding to and from appointments in style. :) He is a happy man who can get from one end of town to the other in 3.8 seconds. 

Jon did another four round cycle of chemo in June and July and had another scan. The scan showed that the chemo was successfully combating the lung metastasis still with continued shrinking of spots. Unfortunately, it has been less successful with the primary tumor which has doubled in size since the last scan. We thought that might be the case as he has had a significant increase in pain over the course of the last several weeks. The good news is that we know the source of the pain. He will resume chemo in two weeks and we will meet with the Radiologist around that same time to see if they can help to shrink the tumor and provide some pain relief. 

Today's scripture of the day from the YouVersion bible app is "whatever you have learned and received and heard and seen in me -practice these things and the God of Peace will be with you. Phil 4:9 That seems a bit perfect. We need to be above being blown about by the winds of the world...good or bad. We just keep walking out the truth we know and be consistent demonstrating who we are based on who we belong to. GOD is bigger and stronger than our circumstances. He is timeless and sees the big picture we cannot see. So... the Gore family is ok. Jon's spirits are good ( the car helps). We all have our moments but know how to take a deep breath and refocus. We love and appreciate you! 

May
19
2019

May 19, 2019

Jonathan and I are sitting here in the kitchen together enjoying a quiet moment and realized we have not given an update in over a month. Life continues on in the midst to this cancer journey. Ethan finished his sophomore year and is set to switch to a Covenant Christian High School in the fall. He is now prepping for a busy summer with a mission trip, camp and football.  Nate has turned 18, enrolled in IVY Tech for the fall, went to prom and is about to finish high school in the next two weeks. Leslie has moved into her first apartment and Joshua found out that he has been accepted into the internship he wanted for his senior year and is home and working for the summer. Honestly, all the normalcy makes Jon's cancer seem a bit surreal still even though we have been walking that walk for almost 6 months now. 

Two weeks ago Jonathan finished the 4th round of this second cycle of chemo. It was much rougher than the first cycle and he had many more side effects from the treatment. Both significant fatigue and pain are consistent and commonplace now. I have a conference in Palm Springs the first week of June and He and Ethan will be coming with me. Jon has decided to take a five week break from chemo so that he can build up his strength and hopefully feel better for our trip. He is set to have a new CT scan on Monday and then resume chemo on June 13. Jonathan has stated repeatedly that he is giving thanks for the results of the scan regardless of what those results may be. In the meantime, he is working to find ways to enjoy himself. He recently had a moped built that matched the one he had as a kid (a 1984 Silver Bullet). He jumped on it and rode around the neighborhood like a teenager the day it arrived. He also just purchased a set of golf clubs for our trip to Palm Springs... hope springs eternal with Jonathan as he hasn't played a round a golf in over 20 years. It will be an interesting sight to see. The boys, who have never golfed beyond a plastic set when they were toddlers and a few rounds of mini-golf here and there, are set to "learn" too.  Stay tuned and if you happen to be in Palm Springs the first week of June, please watch for incoming stray golf balls. 

Thank you for supporting us and loving us. We are thankful to you and to God for enabling us to persevere! 

April
14
2019

April 14, 2019

HOLY SMOKES! How has it been a month since the last update? Sorry about that...as I am sure is true with all of you, life keeps spinning at a dizzying speed. 

Jonathan is 2 treatments into a 4 treatment cycle. The plan with this new treatment it to do 4 treatment cycles with scans in between. The next scan will be the end of May. I am staring at my computer trying to figure out the nice way to say this but... the reality is this round is a bit rough. He feels sick, is in pain (bone pain) and is having some issues with neuropathy and random muscle contractions. That has impacted, and rightfully so, his mental state. He recently sent me a text that said " I know what God has planned for me is pure joy, but getting there is a little rough". Can I just tell you how proud I am of him? It takes so much integrity to walk this path with focus on what God has called him to do when everything inside of him is screaming  "I don't want to!". 

I know I say this every time but it is so true. WE COULD NOT DO THIS WITHOUT YOU. Visits, texts, meals, hugs at the right moment, hugs at the wrong moment...its amazing and humbling. Some times I feel like I cannot form a coherent thought and someone will jump in and patiently be my brain for me. Some times Jonathan struggles with carrying this load and friends stop by to pray and laugh and cry with him. The same is true with the support of the kids. We are grateful and despite the current realities we have all that we need! 

Love to all


Don't be afraid, just Believe! Luke 8:50

March
14
2019

March 13, 2019

Hello,

Today we had the long awaited followed up visit with the Oncologist to discuss the newest scans following the treatment Jonathan recieved. In the waiting room I was reading a devotional. The scripture was Matthew 26: 36-39. This section of the scripture is shortly before Christ's cruxifiction when he was in garden. He took his closest friends in with him and asked them to "sit here while I go over there and pray". The author of the devotional wrote, "while I've mulled over Jesus' tribulation in the garden before, I've never dwelt on the fact that he invited his friends to grieve with him and pray with him". Interestingly, I had never thought that through that way before either. What a gift God has given us with people to love us and walk through life with us! Somethings just feel to big to do alone!  We got to enjoy a bit of that over the weekend when Jonahtan, his siblings Joe and Janine, Joshua, Laura and I went to WV last weekend to see his family. It was a special trip and so good to see his uncle and cousins. 

Today at the Oncologist, we recieved good news, bad news and neutral news. First the good news. Radiation did what it needed to do to improve his quality of life so we are done with that for good. That is one less thing and we are thankful. The other good news is that the previous spots on his liver did not show up on the new scan! His lungs were a bit trickier. Some of the spots shrunk, some grew and some new ones showed up. The same is true with the lymph nodes. Beginning next week he will be starting a new chemo regimen as we work to keep the cancer at bay for as long as we can. This will be an every two week infusion with a infusion pouch that will go with him for 48 hour periods.  After we do this for a several weeks, he will get a new scan and we will make the next round of decisions from there. 

We are still walking the path in front of us, thankful that people will sit with us and experience the moments with us knowing the God's strength is made perfect in our weakness! 


February
21
2019

February 20, 2019

Hello and Happy Wednesday,

It has been a good week. Jon finished radiation on Tuesday and then went to spend a few days with his parents. He is healing rapidly from the feeding tube fiascos and is feeling much stronger. In addition, the radiation has helped shrink the tumors so much that he has actually been able to eat! That has not happened since October!

He has not had chemo in three weeks because of the needed healing. We are now waiting for new CT scans and then a discussion about the next steps. We welcome your prayers! 

In the meantime, we are still in awe-filled gratitude with the great support. From a scripture jar, to meals, to kind words and people loving on the kiddos, we are strengthend by YOU! The scripture on the back of our new shirts is 2 Cor 12: 9-10 about God's strength being made perfect in our weakness...your kindness is one of the ways that God is showing his strength in this situation. Because of that we can keep saying #Bringiton

Here's to another day!

February
11
2019

Ready for the Week!

Hello from the frozen tundra... It is the Midwest though so I am sure it will be 50 by the middle of the week

JON IS HOME! He came home Saturday and was so happy to be here. He is healing from his procedures, now has a home health nurse checking on him and has a new feeding system that feeds hm automatically for 14 hours in the evening and overnight. He gets worn out pretty easily but we are in a MUCH better place than we were this time last week. Chemo is on hold for at least another week but this should be our last full week of radiation.Moving forward! Most importantly Gracie is much more content now that her therapy human has returned. She has not left his side.... Love to all, C

February
9
2019

A Different Kind of Post

Hello, this will be a different kind of post and a little more intimate than I would usually share but for some reason I feel compelled to do so. If it feels inappropriate or a bit too much you can chalk it up to the emotions of the hour. 

First an update, Jonathan is still in the hospital. It has been a bit harder to stabilize the situation than any of us would have hoped, but we are getting closer and hoping intently for Saturday jail break. He is very very ready to come home. Chemo has been put on hold this week and next to promote healing but we are powering through with radiation. He has 8 more left! We are getting there! Keep praying. It helps! 

Ok...so...this might be a long part and more about me than Jonathan. Feel free to move on if that is more than you came to see. 😉

Truth be told this was a rough week for everyone around here. Lots of emotion. Nate, Ethan and Leslie had a front row seat on Sunday and Monday and by Tuesday it began to take a toll. They have done an incredible job of rolling with the punches but it was not easy this week. Within the last 24 hours, I started to struggle. Today when I went in to work I had to stop all hugs because I did not think I could handle it. I even told a favorite coworker, “no kindness. I can’t handle kindness right now”. After work, I  went back to the hospital to see Jonathan. The visit was short because he was exhausted so I stopped by the hospital chapel. Sitting in the chapel, which has not been redecorated in like 20 years, I began thinking of all of the times that I had been in there before...when my Dad was sick and dying, when I was in the hospital with Katie and multiple times after she died ( for a few years after I would go there every now and then to pray and be close to the last place I was with her) and then when I had cancer and was so fearful of that  diagnosis when we had 4 small kids… So many experiences over the last 17 or so years. I kept having the visual of Jon pushing me through the halls in my wheelchair and Joshua running alongside it when I was in the hospital for the 6 weeks with Katie. Joshua was always smiling and somehow Jon made it fun. Sitting in the chapel tonight, I read Hebrews 11, 2 Corinthians 12 and Psalm 139. I prayed a bit more and then began to walk out. I stopped to read the prayer book at the entrance to the chapel. I used to always write in it when I would go the chapel after Katie. Reading everyone's prayer requests tonight was so humbling. A man named Rodney has cancer and someone who loves him wrote a prayer request for him every day for 2 weeks. A child's handwriting said "Pray for my sister Cate. She is in heaven now”. One person asked for prayer that Purdue would stop calling her about unpaid bills (LOL). Others wrote thanking God for successful surgeries, procedures and healing… there was so much pain, so much hope and so much life. That led me to think,  what right do we have to be any different than anyone else who is hurting or walking really difficult paths? As Christians we know that we don't have a right to a pain free life nor do we get to choose our experiences. In fact, Jonathan made a comment to me recently that it was not about winning or losing a battle with a disease, its about continuing to walk faithfully with God wherever the path goes and doing so in a way that showcases the truth of all that He is. That's the key, right? The gift that we have as people who believe in Christ is that even in the midst of the biggest challenges, we have HOPE that He is at work and that He will use this somehow in some way to help someone see HIM. This is something I have always counted on and can ALWAYS get behind. So deep breath. #BringItOn  God’s strength is made perfect in our weakness. I will sleep well tonight.

Thanks for hanging in there on this post and more importantly, thank you for hanging in there with us! You are appreciated and we are thankful.