Journal entry by Susan Young Finney —
We all know what a stinker he's been, how many inappropriate choices he's made, how he has hurt those closest to him emotionally and physically but he is a part of us. He created this family and God loves him regardless, and so should we. Forgiveness is easy if you have God at your side but the forgetting is what's difficult. We all have a long road ahead of us but his will be the most difficult.
I know he will ask me WHY is God allowing this to happen to me? Why did he make this happen to me? I've wrestled with these types of questions for years but it wasn't until last week it became truly clear. God doesn't make or allow any negative things to happen to us. He gives us free will. This free will allows us to make any choice we want. We should be having him guide us through each choice we make, but we are human and forget along the way. With the free will comes consequences. Positive consequences when we follow HIS guidance and negative when we don't.
15+ years ago John was diagnosed with diabetes. Dr. Hyuna Steward was his doctor at the time, in Monroe, MI. He was very good at his diabetic regimen in the beginning. He took all of the medications needed and followed an appropriate diet....for a time. The inconvenience of what he truly wanted to eat became a a thorn in his side, so the diet fell by the way side. The medication was the next. He thought I was trying to kill him. (Yeah, we all shook our heads at that one.) Generic pills are different from time to time based upon the current "deal" a pharmacy might receive. Because of this, some of his pills would look different. He concluded in his mind, I was swapping pills out and trying to slowly kill him. No matter how I tried to convince him, he was dead set on that idea. Hence, he stopped taking ALL medication for a good 5 years. Free will! When he began taking the medicine again, the damage had been done. Not because God was punishing him, but because diabetes had started the irreversible damage on his body. Free will.
John knew what he was doing when he removed himself from diabetic maintenance. He chose that on his own. Free will. None of us truly think we are destructible. We believe we will live forever and we don't need to do any maintenance to our bodies. (I've got a couple of sons who do this now, which scares me.) Free will. The consequence has been made. The result is irreversible. John has locally advanced pancreatic adenocarcinoma.
I know he will ask me WHY is God allowing this to happen to me? Why did he make this happen to me? I've wrestled with these types of questions for years but it wasn't until last week it became truly clear. God doesn't make or allow any negative things to happen to us. He gives us free will. This free will allows us to make any choice we want. We should be having him guide us through each choice we make, but we are human and forget along the way. With the free will comes consequences. Positive consequences when we follow HIS guidance and negative when we don't.
15+ years ago John was diagnosed with diabetes. Dr. Hyuna Steward was his doctor at the time, in Monroe, MI. He was very good at his diabetic regimen in the beginning. He took all of the medications needed and followed an appropriate diet....for a time. The inconvenience of what he truly wanted to eat became a a thorn in his side, so the diet fell by the way side. The medication was the next. He thought I was trying to kill him. (Yeah, we all shook our heads at that one.) Generic pills are different from time to time based upon the current "deal" a pharmacy might receive. Because of this, some of his pills would look different. He concluded in his mind, I was swapping pills out and trying to slowly kill him. No matter how I tried to convince him, he was dead set on that idea. Hence, he stopped taking ALL medication for a good 5 years. Free will! When he began taking the medicine again, the damage had been done. Not because God was punishing him, but because diabetes had started the irreversible damage on his body. Free will.
John knew what he was doing when he removed himself from diabetic maintenance. He chose that on his own. Free will. None of us truly think we are destructible. We believe we will live forever and we don't need to do any maintenance to our bodies. (I've got a couple of sons who do this now, which scares me.) Free will. The consequence has been made. The result is irreversible. John has locally advanced pancreatic adenocarcinoma.
Patients and caregivers love hearing from you; add a comment to show your support.
Help John Stay Connected to Family and Friends
A $30 donation to CaringBridge powers a site like John's site for one month. Will you make a gift to help ensure that this site stays online for them and for you?