A moment that will forever be imprinted in my mind, came during what felt like one of the hardest times in my life.  We were going on week 2 of Jaren being admitted in the hospital, where every day brought more bad news rather than positive progress.  I had just returned back to Milwaukee after spending the weekend in Green Bay with Layton.  Jaren and I laid together on the hospital bed, just crying out to God wondering where He was.  We began discussing the story of Job, and how it seemed like Jaren was the modern day equivalent to Job, being plagued with one calamity after another.  However, we found refuge in the fact that Job's story didn't end in distress, but in complete restoration and prayed that God would do the same in our own lives. 

Well my friends, the past two months have been the definition of God's unfathomable grace in restoring our family.  It's hard to even put into words all of the amazing things that have happened, but I will try to do my best.

Upon returning home from the transplant, Jaren began his new role at United Healthcare. He absolutely loves it, and has thoroughly enjoyed his new responsibilities and coworkers.  I also accepted a new position at Foxview Intermediate School teaching 5th grade math and science.  This is the school that our children will attend and is a whopping 0.8 miles away from our house.  Although I was incredibly sad to leave the great people at Lincoln, I have been overwhelmed by the support and kindness that everyone at Foxview has shown.  I am so excited to be able to focus on just two subject areas and love how connected the school is to the community.  It has felt like a breath of fresh air walking through the halls, and I truly can't wait to get started.

Next up, on July 30th, Jaren was officially declared in remission!!!!!! Our doctor walked in smiling sharing that she only had good news.  Together we all hugged and cried, breathing out what was probably the deepest sigh of relief in my life.  This day also marked our third wedding anniversary, which was a slight upgrade in comparison to the previous year when Jaren got chemo on our anniversary. Jaren is feeling great, and you would never know what his body had gone through just three months ago!

You might be asking yourself, well how could their lives get any better? New jobs, renovated home, remission??? Drumroll please...... WE ARE ADOPTING A BABY!!!!!! That's right my friends, in about a week, we are going from a family of three to a completed family of four.  Our miracle baby GIRL is due to be born any day now. Although there's so much that I want to share about our adoptive story, I know that much of it is not my story to tell yet. It is our sweet baby girl's story and her brave first mama who chose life in order to bring her into this world. What I can tell you though is that this is a story that only God can write, and we are so excited to see him continue to pen this story of redemption and grace.

As many of you know, on December 14th, we found out that the cancer was still there and Jaren would need chemo treatments that would leave us unable to expand our family naturally. Rather than banking sperm, we continued to trust that God would expand our family for His glory. From that day on, we prayed every single day for the baby, and the mother that would bring her into this world. It was during that very week, our sweet baby girl was conceived. Yes, you read that correctly. The same exact week that we felt some of the deepest pain possible from mourning our shattered dreams, God had brought to life the miracle child that would complete our family. And so even when I felt like God had rejected me and had altogether disappeared, He was not absent.  In fact, he was present in unfathomable ways, orchestrating a narrative that not even the greatest author could write. The coolest part in all of this is we did absolutely nothing to pursue this child. We were reached out to by a friend from church who said she knew of an expectant mother who was searching for a Christian family to adopt her child. She asked if we'd be willing to consider it, so we wrote the mother a letter explaining our story, our heart for adoption, and our prayer for her and the baby. About a week after Jaren was officially declared in remission, we found out that the birth mother had desired us to adopt her child! I will tell you that we are amazed by this woman and the redemptive story that God is writing in her own life. We are humbled by her sacrifice in choosing to surrender her own preferences to provide a life for her child that she wouldn't have been able to provide. I can't even fathom the pain she is having to endure as she prepares to give birth to the child she so deeply loves, knowing that she will be leaving the hospital empty-handed.

I will never fully understand why God considered us worthy enough to have been able to experience Him in the ways that we have for the last year and a half. God knew exactly what He needed to do in order to make us willing to surrender our preferences to His and open our hands to the plans He had for our lives. I also stand in awe that God would choose to lavish us with so much grace by answering every major prayer request we'd been praying for over a year and a half, all in the matter of a three week span. 

We ask that you would join us in prayer as we prepare to bring our sweet baby girl into our family. Please pray for all of the logistics and legal aspects necessary to bring her home, as well as the health of her and her mother. Most importantly, please be praying for our baby girl's first mama. Pray she would experience a peace that surpasses understanding, that she would encounter God's redeeming love in her own life, and for the strength to carryout one of the most difficult decisions ever in choosing adoption. She has also recently come to know the Lord, so please pray that she would continue to grow in her relationship with Him.

This baby girl has no idea how loved she already is. She has the same village that has supported and surrounded us for the last year and a half, cheering her on as she pursues her dreams and grows in her relationship with God. I don't know if I will ever be able to put into words how thankful we are for each member of our village and for showing God's love and grace even when we might not have been able to directly feel Him. Thank you for loving our family so well and joining us on our journey. Now, let's celebrate new beginnings!!!! 

This is my story, this is my song, praising my savior all the day long.