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Journal

September
24
2020

A Feeling of Deja Vu

Fall is upon us. Cooler sunrises and sunsets. Night fires in the fire pits, hoodies, warm cocoa, or for the most of you, “pumpkin spice everything” is in the air. 
But in our home the smell of fresh picked grapes, blueberries and peppers have been in abundance...yes I have been canning jelly. Although we hardly eat it, I just give it away. And yes, I know store bought jelly is not expensive, but I love to make it. 
It reminds me of when I was a kid and watching my Mama make it. It gives me a longing for when times were much simpler. I think when we sense a familiar smell, place or song on the radio, we instantly feel comforted by days gone by.
We are transported back in time to childhood, when our world was just a few streets wide, when our main concern was running out of daylight before making it home for dinner. Nostalgia has a way of erasing the daily annoyances we experience such as- jobs, finances and health and it leaves behind only the warm, fuzzy feelings.
So you see, I’m not just making jelly, I am erasing the day and living in the simpler times. Just waiting for the “ping” of jars, it brings a smile to my face and a sense of deja vu. 

Speaking of deja vu, Gray had an appointment today with his orthopedic dr. Dr. Klifto. The reason I said “deja vu” is because this is where it all began...the culprit, his shoulder. 
He was scheduled for his 3rd round of injections...but he did not receive them. Upon talking with Dr. Klifto about his shoulder pain, the Doc recommends an MRI. 
And we trust him completely, and honestly, if it wasn’t for him Gray may not be here today. He originally did an MRI on Gray’s shoulder in 2018, and found the lesion that lead to the findings of his Multiple Myeloma. 
As Dr. Klifto said when walking in our room, “hey y’all are like my family!”
So much so that he whipped his phone out and said, “My wife just had twin daughters, and they also have a 3 year old daughter, and proceeded to show us his 3 beautiful daughters pictures.”  

So we travel back to Duke on October 15th to the Adult Bone Marrow Clinic for labs, immunization shots,  a consultation and an MRI. 
Then on the 16th, back to Dr. Klifto to get the MRI results. 

And yes, Dr. Klifto will be receiving a few jars of homemade jelly. 

Remind yourself that every day has its hardships and its bright spots. No matter how old you are, and no matter how bad things seem, you will probably look back on today with some nostalgia. Think about what you will be nostalgic about, and focus on that today, what you will remember as being important, meaningful, and fun 5, 10, 15 years from now. If it is making jelly, then make jelly. 

God bless and Thank you. 

“I have just three things to teach: simplicity, patience, compassion. These three are your greatest treasures.”
~ Lao Tzu

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Comments

  • Nancy Turner : Judy, you have a beautiful way with words. Thank you for sharing your journey all these months. I can imagine and feel "home" in your words and today, a sense of peace. (Around our house, it was always crabapple jelly.) You and Gray are in my thoughts and prayers always.
    9/24/20
  • pat rogers : Gray, RL, and I have you in our prayers daily. Continue to pray. Praying you to get a good report. You and Judy have been true heroes throughout your first diagnosis till now. I know it hasn't been easy, but you are a fighter. Love and prayers continue for you and Judy. 🙏🙏🙏♥️
    9/24/20