I have decided I need to focus on my mental health, my grief and trauma of losing DJ. Nothing prepares you for this and there are no rules or guidelines on how to grieve. I have come to understand that the person that has been present for the past 10 months has been hanging on by a thread and I almost lost the thread. I am sorry on how I delivered my frustration and hurt but I am not sorry for what I said. No person should fight to heal while fighting to survive. We are humans, not robots and we are not factory workers. Secondary trauma is real, compassion fatigue is real and when you are in an environment where everyone day is stress, emotional and mentally exhausting the last thing is to then have an agency that does not support or care for the wellbeing of their employees. This is why the door revolves so much in CPS. It’s not the challenges within the work. I loved what I did. It’s the challenges within the leadership that is weak and broken. People don’t leave the work, they walk away from the people, the leadership.