Journal entry by Cindy Hartley —
50 Years Older
**While I figure out how to manage this site, if I’m emailing this to you, please refrain from any social media posts just yet, as we still have many people in our world who are not aware of Chase’s situation. Thank you.**
Three days ago, I never dreamed I’d be writing one of these “blogs.” I tend to be pretty private, and deal with challenges by turning inward, instead of outward. I’m not one to share really personal things in social media or other settings, however I realize the need for this forum, at this time, but I will try not to overwhelm with too many posts. This week, I am humbled beyond words, by the overwhelming generosity, kindness and love, shown to us by the people in our lives. By our families, our friends, our colleagues, our kids’ teachers, school staff and coaches. Despite not wanting to be an over-sharer, we just have so many amazing people in our world, that I decided to start this site as a way to communicate how things are progressing with Chase. I will include some details as a way of keeping record for our family as well. Later, maybe Chase and Ellie will be interested in these for review, and I know I will forget most of the details along the way. First and foremost, let me say that almost as overwhelming as a diagnosis that “your child has cancer,” is the love and outpouring of support we have received from so very many of you. Thank you, thank you, thank you beyond words for all of the love.
Diagnosis
About 10 days ago, on Halloween night, Chase began feeling very tired. He had a cough, and his energy and appetite decreased. We cut out of trick or treating a little early and he eventually left our neighborhood party to go home and go to bed. I figured he was coming down with a cold or some kind of viral illness. He went to school for a few days, but after not really improving, we checked in with his pediatrician who ordered an x-ray. His lungs sounded clear, but his cough and shortness of breath were concerning. They read what they initially thought was a small pneumonia on the chest x-ray. So he was started on antibiotics. However, he did not improve, so we took him back for follow-up. At that time, he had developed petechiae on his abdomen, and bruising on his face and throughout his body. His pediatrician sent Matt emergently to the main Children’s Hospital here in Colorado (Aurora campus). After endless tests in the ED, they knew pretty much immediately, that we certainly weren’t dealing with pneumonia. His labs indicated leukemia. We now know it is acute T cell lymphoblastic leukemia. His WBC count, which shouldn’t be more than around 10, was 444. His lymphoblast count, which should be less than 5%, was 94%. A CT scan of his chest showed a large mediastinal mass, pushing on his heart and lungs, with fluid surrounding his heart. He was admitted to the ICU and a surprising amount of experts have been working aggressively on his case behind the scenes.
The next morning, things progressed rapidly. A team of anesthesiologists, cardiologists, interventionalists, oncologists and intensivists discussed how to proceed with the testing he would need that day. He ended up undergoing a lumbar puncture, where chemotherapy was injected, and a PICC line was placed for future chemo, which he received the following day as well.
Throughout all of this, he has been unbelievably brave. He has not complained once. He asks when he can go home. He wants to see his friends and school. He asks when he will feel better. He is in a lot of pain, and too weak to sit up on his own or remove his oxygen, but he’s such a good sport. The hospital has been wonderful, and I feel so grateful for the team of doctors and staff we are dealing with. I work in this world and am rarely impressed; they definitely know how to work with kids here.
We spent the past few days explaining to our daughter that her brother has cancer. We explained to our son, that he has cancer. That he will be getting chemotherapy, and he will lose his hair. This part has really caused him a lot of sadness.
He has required platelet, plasma, and now blood transfusions. He is responding to his chemo today and his white blood cell counts are going down. He is very tired. We hope to see some shrinking soon in the size of the tumor.
When something like this happens, your mind thinks of 10 billion questions. You feel a thousand emotions in a minute. You want it not to be real. I told my mom when I drove home briefly after the second day here, “I’m 50 years older than when I came.” What I do know, is that there is much goodness in the world. The amount of love and support we have received is just beyond what you could ever imagine. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts, for the millions of deeds, large and small, that so many of you have already done, and of course I know there are so many we don’t know about. I literally believe we feel all of the prayers we have been told are sent on our behalf. I was able to quit crying today. I found my strength. That is because of you.
As most of you probably know, Hospital stays don’t afford much downtime. Between the army of doctors, nurses, child life, registration, dietician, chaplain, social worker, etc etc etc, there literally is hardly any time to do anything but talk to them. I will try to post these updates as a way to communicate regularly to all who have asked about our boy. Thank you for being a part of our lives. Please pray for Chase.
**While I figure out how to manage this site, if I’m emailing this to you, please refrain from any social media posts just yet, as we still have many people in our world who are not aware of Chase’s situation. Thank you.**
Three days ago, I never dreamed I’d be writing one of these “blogs.” I tend to be pretty private, and deal with challenges by turning inward, instead of outward. I’m not one to share really personal things in social media or other settings, however I realize the need for this forum, at this time, but I will try not to overwhelm with too many posts. This week, I am humbled beyond words, by the overwhelming generosity, kindness and love, shown to us by the people in our lives. By our families, our friends, our colleagues, our kids’ teachers, school staff and coaches. Despite not wanting to be an over-sharer, we just have so many amazing people in our world, that I decided to start this site as a way to communicate how things are progressing with Chase. I will include some details as a way of keeping record for our family as well. Later, maybe Chase and Ellie will be interested in these for review, and I know I will forget most of the details along the way. First and foremost, let me say that almost as overwhelming as a diagnosis that “your child has cancer,” is the love and outpouring of support we have received from so very many of you. Thank you, thank you, thank you beyond words for all of the love.
Diagnosis
About 10 days ago, on Halloween night, Chase began feeling very tired. He had a cough, and his energy and appetite decreased. We cut out of trick or treating a little early and he eventually left our neighborhood party to go home and go to bed. I figured he was coming down with a cold or some kind of viral illness. He went to school for a few days, but after not really improving, we checked in with his pediatrician who ordered an x-ray. His lungs sounded clear, but his cough and shortness of breath were concerning. They read what they initially thought was a small pneumonia on the chest x-ray. So he was started on antibiotics. However, he did not improve, so we took him back for follow-up. At that time, he had developed petechiae on his abdomen, and bruising on his face and throughout his body. His pediatrician sent Matt emergently to the main Children’s Hospital here in Colorado (Aurora campus). After endless tests in the ED, they knew pretty much immediately, that we certainly weren’t dealing with pneumonia. His labs indicated leukemia. We now know it is acute T cell lymphoblastic leukemia. His WBC count, which shouldn’t be more than around 10, was 444. His lymphoblast count, which should be less than 5%, was 94%. A CT scan of his chest showed a large mediastinal mass, pushing on his heart and lungs, with fluid surrounding his heart. He was admitted to the ICU and a surprising amount of experts have been working aggressively on his case behind the scenes.
The next morning, things progressed rapidly. A team of anesthesiologists, cardiologists, interventionalists, oncologists and intensivists discussed how to proceed with the testing he would need that day. He ended up undergoing a lumbar puncture, where chemotherapy was injected, and a PICC line was placed for future chemo, which he received the following day as well.
Throughout all of this, he has been unbelievably brave. He has not complained once. He asks when he can go home. He wants to see his friends and school. He asks when he will feel better. He is in a lot of pain, and too weak to sit up on his own or remove his oxygen, but he’s such a good sport. The hospital has been wonderful, and I feel so grateful for the team of doctors and staff we are dealing with. I work in this world and am rarely impressed; they definitely know how to work with kids here.
We spent the past few days explaining to our daughter that her brother has cancer. We explained to our son, that he has cancer. That he will be getting chemotherapy, and he will lose his hair. This part has really caused him a lot of sadness.
He has required platelet, plasma, and now blood transfusions. He is responding to his chemo today and his white blood cell counts are going down. He is very tired. We hope to see some shrinking soon in the size of the tumor.
When something like this happens, your mind thinks of 10 billion questions. You feel a thousand emotions in a minute. You want it not to be real. I told my mom when I drove home briefly after the second day here, “I’m 50 years older than when I came.” What I do know, is that there is much goodness in the world. The amount of love and support we have received is just beyond what you could ever imagine. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts, for the millions of deeds, large and small, that so many of you have already done, and of course I know there are so many we don’t know about. I literally believe we feel all of the prayers we have been told are sent on our behalf. I was able to quit crying today. I found my strength. That is because of you.
As most of you probably know, Hospital stays don’t afford much downtime. Between the army of doctors, nurses, child life, registration, dietician, chaplain, social worker, etc etc etc, there literally is hardly any time to do anything but talk to them. I will try to post these updates as a way to communicate regularly to all who have asked about our boy. Thank you for being a part of our lives. Please pray for Chase.
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