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Journal

January
19
2021

January 19, 2021

Yesterday marked two years post accident.  I'm not going to sugar coat it and say it isn't an emotional day for us-because it is.  It's bittersweet, actually.  Two years ago we didn't know if she would make it or not.  Two years ago there were no promises-only "We just don't know".  While she has survived and fights every single day to improve her quality of life she is STILL with us!!!  Somedays its hard to not be angry though. She was so young. She had so much ahead of her. It's painful to watch her struggle and get upset and not be able to do a damn thing to help her.  All I know is that she WILL overcome this.  She has to. She is one strong willed girl and that's what has gotten her this far. 

So with that said on to her progress.  I'm not so sure there is much out there as infuriating and as puzzling as the human brain. Most days she is improving leaps and bounds and then there are days where we  just watch her and want to cry.  It's like two steps forward and three steps back.  Those are the days when all we can do is surround her with as much love, compassion, and of course hugs as we possibly can. It's hard not to say we understand her struggles and frustration. Honestly we can't. I can only imagine how she must feel when she has days like this. I think one of  the biggest hurdles we have is that she has always been so independent-so now when we ask what she is doing when she gets up, or we follow her to make sure she doesn't fall we are accused of being helicopters. She gets very upset because she thinks that she can do everything on her own. While she can do a lot on her own, she is still a fall risk.  We do everything we can  to make sure she is doing things in a safe manner (which as you can imagine she is less than thrilled about).  She refuses to use her walker or cane most of the time and when we go out she absolutely does NOT want to be in her chair. Most of the time it takes some fast talking on our part to convince her...

Last week she decided she wanted to make us dinner...a recipe she used to make pre-accident.  She and I got ready and went to the grocery store. A full grocery trip and she pushed the cart through the entire store like a champ.  When we got home she did just what she set out to do. Make us dinner. A fabulous dinner at that!
It has been nice that she can now take showers on her own. I just need to be there when she gets in and out of the shower to make sure she doesn't fall.  She also has become very helpful with unloading the dishwasher (which everyone knows she wasn't a fan of straightening up pre-accident).  One day she even looked at me and said "I definitely have a brain injury!" She always knows how to make me laugh!!

As for her therapy...  She has physical therapy 3 days a week, occupational and speech two days a week.  Physical therapy is super intense...building her strength in her arms, legs, and core.  Her therapist even met us at our gym last week to see what equipment they have and he did a workout plan for me to do with her when we go.  Occupational helps with more of the fine motor skills and of course speech works on speech but also helps with her memory. Her short term memory is definitely improving.  Hell-Most days her memory is better than mine!!






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Comments

  • Maria K. : #AshtonStrong!!! To tell you all to hold on and hold tight would be redundant as you all so clearly do that so well as a family... good days and bad. God truly has given you all the blessing of one another, but even just as impressive is that you know that... not all people/ families do, even after a traumatic event. So to see how ademately you lead with your hearts to always hold on and hold tight together as a family, is truly commemorable. Some people might argue that you don't have a choice, oh but they are wrong. Unfortunately that's not always true. Some families don't. Of course you're allowed days to yell it out, release the frustration, wonder why, but at the end of the day, week, whatever ... you recognize the blessings you have with having one another.... and that is what makes you all so strong.... your strength is strongest collectively and your blessed enough to know that... good days and bad. What love!!!! Our hearts are with you through struggles and triumphs, however one thing is for sure, it's your own strong hearts as a family that will carry you through. Ashton- Fight on fighter! Live life to the FULLEST always and forever! You got this girl!!! You got this as a family too!!! xoxo
    4/24/21
  • carol rogers : Ashton is an amazing young woman and she is blessed to be surrounded by amazing family. As I have said so many times before - Go Ashton, Fight Like A Girl!!
    1/20/21
  • karen zaniker : We are cheering for Amber all the time and wish we could share some of her work. Love to all of you and your amazing support!
    1/20/21
  • June Roman : Thanks for the update. Am praying for you every day.
    1/20/21
  • Pat Lands : Wonderful update. Will continue to pray. She sounds like she is struggling to maintain some independancy.
    1/19/21
  • Kristen Nalley : Ashton is a true inspiration! She is so blessed to have you as a mom and your family to support her!
    1/19/21