7 Helpful Ways to Show Someone You Love Them
CaringBridge Staff | 06.25.23
Love is more than just three simple words. You can see it everyday – from the man walking his beloved pup down the street, to the woman helping her neighbor carry her groceries in from the car. It can be portrayed through words, actions, acts of services, and even the smallest of gestures.
When someone you love is going through a difficult time, they are in need of your love and support more than ever. But how do you show someone you love them? We turned to the CaringBridge community for some helpful insight and their best tips.
1. Write Them a Letter
Whether it’s to thank them for being in your life, or a note that tells them just how much you love them, your letter becomes a keepsake that they can cherish forever. Whenever they find themselves in hard times, they can look back on your letter with fondness.
“I send a handwritten letter followed by a phone call if we are far apart. If we live close to each other, lunch, or just coffee, a hug, and lots of listening!”
Sandra L.
2. Do Something Thoughtful
If you live near your loved one, try doing something that you know they would appreciate. Help them tidy their home, invite them over for a coffee and a board game, or help them maintain their garden. Sometimes it’s the smaller, more thoughtful actions that have the greatest impact.
Even if you live far away, you can still do something for your loved one that they would appreciate. Send them a care package with their favorite treats!
“Here are some things I did when my sister was fighting breast cancer. She lived 8 hours away so I couldn’t just drop by or cook her a meal. I hired someone to clean her house – I contacted a friend of hers to find someone in the area that would clean the house. I sent a care package – in early December I put together a box of Christmas treats and mailed it to her – cookies, candies, coffee mug, flavored teas, candle, cute kitchen towels, whatever. She especially loved the cookies and candy. She didn’t have enough energy to do any baking but this way she still had some homemade goodies to share with friends who dropped by. And she was thoughtful too. When my daughter was sick she sent her a box of sunshine – all sorts of yellow items – nail polish, lip balm, post-it’s, peanut M&Ms. Another cute long distance one was my niece had her kids lie on a roll of paper and spread their arms out.She traced around their arms and cut it out then mailed it to my sister saying they were hugs to wrap around her.”
Mary W.C.
3. Tell Them You Love Them
This one seems obvious, but sometimes, all your loved one needs is for you to tell them that you love them and are there to support them. These words are a reassurance that you are there for them and will always be a shoulder they can lean on.
A quick communication tip: beginning or ending your sentences with the word “you” really highlights the focus on the person you are speaking to. “I love you,” “You mean so much to me” and “I appreciate you,” are all simple, but impactful ways to show someone that you care.
“Everyone who comes into your life is sent there for a reason; sometimes you just need to listen or say ‘I love you.'”
Jean K.
“Tell them…call and express to them in words. SAY IT. Tell them they are appreciated, loved, and say thank you for being in my life. I did this once to an adult and it blew my mind.. the adult had said that they had never been told in words that they were loved and appreciated.”
Gail G.
4. Listen to Them
Sometimes showing someone you love them can be as simple as lending a listening ear. People that are going through difficult times often bottle up emotions for fear of being a burden to everyone else. Ask them how they are feeling, and really pay attention to their answer.
Open your mind, your ears and your heart in order to make the other person the sole focus of your attention – it will show them that you are there to support them, no matter how difficult things may become.
“Be there for them, listen intently and assist them in whatever they want/need … along with loving them!”
Rik D.
“Be willing to LISTEN to anything they want to talk about — without interrupting with your own stories. Keep the focus on that person!”
Bobby X.
5. Spend Quality Time Together
Go for a walk or spend the afternoon watching their favorite movie to help them feel present in the moment. This small gesture has the power to show someone that you love them, even without saying a word.
6. Cook Them Their Favorite Meal
Cooking for someone is a beautiful way to show them that you love them. Take the time to cook them their favorite meal, especially when maybe they are unable to or don’t feel up to cooking for themselves.
The act of cooking for someone shows care, comfort and sustenance. Whether you cook dinner and spend quality time eating a meal together or you drop off a lasagna for later in the week, the gesture is always sure to be appreciated.
And don’t forget about gift cards. Your loved one may have a craving for a dish from their favorite restaurant, so a gift card might be just the treat they need.
7. Give Them a Hug
If someone you love is going through a difficult time, sometimes the best way to show them you love them is to offer the physical comfort of a hug. This simple gesture could be an opportunity to lift them up and to show them that they matter.
“HUGS, HUGS and more HUGS!”
Sandy D.-Y.
How Else Do You Share the Love?
We hope these tips from the CaringBridge community have offered some helpful guidance on how to share the love.
What other tips do you have to show love, or how do you like to receive it? Please share in the comments below.
Call me, please. Find a way. Take your time. Your sister is In Montana little girl. Figure it out. All in time. 162, 273 loves his real friends. 137 forever. She’s around West.
Sending them a meal through Door dash, grubhub, Ubereats, or some other delivery service is great idea during these times of Covid restrictions.
A simple way to make it easy for friends to provide inspiration and encouragement: Just before my husband had a stem cell transplant, our children and I emailed friends to ask them to send a scripture verse, inspirational saying, favorite joke, good times memory, old photo, etc written on a white index card or plain paper – this was to keep it simple and safe, esp during COVID quarantine since lots of people tried to limit trips to stores. It was also inexpensive ? We used a glue stick to attach everything to a piece of colored stationery (or lightweight card stock) and slipped that into a plastic sleeve so everything could go into a 3 ring “Encouragement Binder” he could look at anytime. A friend also gave him a Prayer Quilt so we suggested that if anyone felt led to do so, they could include a piece of embroidery floss they had prayed over that we could add to the quilt
Making it easy for friends to provide inspiration and encouragement: Just before my husband had a stem cell transplant, our children and I emailed friends to ask them to send a scripture verse, inspirational saying, favorite joke, good times memory, old photo, etc written on a white index card or plain paper – this was to keep it simple and safe, esp during COVID quarantine since lots of people tried to limit trips to stores. It was also inexpensive ? We used a glue stick to attach everything to a piece of colored stationery (or lightweight card stock) and slipped that into a plastic sleeve so everything could go into a 3 ring “Encouragement Binder” he could look at anytime. A friend also gave him a Prayer Quilt so we suggested that if anyone felt led to do so, they could include a piece of embroidery floss they had prayed over that we could add to the quilt
FYI, with the current virus pandemic hugging or being close to someone is to be discouraged, so I suggest those be deleted from your otherwise thoughtful list.
Give someone you love a thinking of you card
A short text expressing your love can mean a lot. I
Don’t judge when you [honestly] cannot understand … Better a quiet tongue and kind eyes.
I loved reading these tips. Thank you. I love Caring Bridge. Thank You!.
For people who need help, don’t say “Let me know if there’s anything I can do.” Be specific….”I’m going to the market, what can I get you?” Or offer to do their laundry and pick it up from them. Also, for people in nursing homes, assisted living facilities, etc., this must be a terribly lonely time for many of them who can’t have visitors, due to Co-Vid 19. Send cards to the residents letting them know someone is thinking about them.
Maybe buy a Netflix Movie or a movie on cable for men going through chemo and weak. Books are always nice, too, but most the men I know don’t appreciate them like a good movie!
My son-in-law had stomach cancer someone wanted to send them a restaurant gift card. He wasn’t able to eat enough to get the benefit out of a gift card. One thing he and our daughter did for some time alone for the two of them was to go to a movie. They did receive a movie gift card and a gift card to go somewhere to get coffee. This was before Covid 19. But they were able to enjoy it.
A fresh coffeepot ready to brew every morning. A spotless (empty) sink to see when walking into kitchen in the a.m.A reminder that God loves them too.
These are all wonderful ways to show people you love them. Several are absolutely essential (like listening!). The only thing I would add is something I learned from my mentor in college. He taught us that to love someone means to “seek their highest good.” And truly seeking someone’s highest good sometimes means sharing with them an uncomfortable truth, suggesting a difficult task, offering corrective counsel. This is the essential work of “speaking the truth in love.” Because it feels risky and requires established relational trust, it is most effectively done in the context of truly deep friendship. And it should always be couched in kindness, patience, and gentleness.
I love to read all the helpful comments on showing love, and on what to say or do when someone close to you has lost a loved one. Thank you.
Thanks for these expressions of showing love.
Learn their love language and be active in providing them what means the most to them.
Be Available.
Love the gestures! I Might also add sending a small personal gift. I have sent inspirational stones, meaningful quotes on small plaques, fun t-shirts…just letting someone know that they are thought of and cared about…<3
I loved the suggestions for showing love. I am going to do the letter writing idea. I have a dear aunt in a nursing home. Because of Covid-19 we have not been able to visit in person. I have so many good memories from childhood until now. My own dear mother passed away 4 years ago. I am going to write her a letter. Thanks for the ideas.
I made a dinner for my 93 year old cousin who I hadn’t seen for a long time. Then I drove from NW Portland to Vancouver, Wa., trying to avoid the busy driving times. Thankful it went well. I think shewas quite surprised. She lives in an apt. and has a married daughter in her area. My cousin had a 3rd pacemaker and it is not as effective for her as she complains that she can’t remember as well. She used to be a warm, bright gregarious woman and isn’t enjoying life as she should, she doesn’t care to live.
I cannot take credit for this. When my dear friend, Estelle Mount had her mother and aunt in nursing homes, she would visit with pictures from their past and listen to them share memories. Also, she would gather anyone who wanted and she would sing oldtime songs with them. These parts of memory remain longer and the residents all loved her and her visits!
When I had my dear mother in a nursing home, she had a special friend there and that lady would always sit by the door cause she said her son was going to come and visit her, Sadly that son never came, he would even send in the monthly payment by mail. I was there every single day to visit with my mother and her friend was always sitting next to her. Felt awful for that poor lady, I would bring her gifts and she loved seeing me, the three of us enjoyed our time together.
great ideas!! thank you!!
SHARE YOUR LOVEAS THE YEARS PASS THE NEED FOR LOVE GROWS. FROM THE LITTLE ONES AT THE BREAST TO THE ELDERLY IN THE HOMES THERE IS ALWAYS THAT INNER DESIRE FOR THE LOVE OF FAMILY MEMBERS. MY WIFE OF SIXTY-SEVEN YEARS LIVED IN AN ASSISTED LIVING HOME FOR NINE YEARS AND WAS INUNDATED WITH LOVE FROM HER FAMILY. I WOULD OFTEN TALK TO HER FRIENDS ABOUT COMING TO VISIT BUT THEY DIDN’T LIKE TO ASSOCIATE WITH PEOPLE IN THOSE PLACES. I WOULD SEE FAMILY MEMBERS OF OTHER RESIDENTS SPEND A FEW MINUTES WITH THEIR KIN THEN LEAVE IN A HURRY SAYING “GOTTA LEAVE MOM, I’M DOUBLE PARKED”. OR THEY WOULD TAP THEIR MOTHER ON THE HEAD AND SAY “GOTTA GO MOM, HAVE A NICE DAY”, AFTER STAYING FOR FIFTEEN MINUTES.LITTLE CHILDREN KNEELING ON THE COUCH ON SATURDAY WAVING BYE TO THEIR FATHER BECAUSE HE HAD A GOLF DATE. A FATHER COMING HOME AND NOT HUGGING THEIR KIDS BECAUSE IT WOULD WRINKLE HIS SHIRT. OR DIAPERS PILING UP IN THE LAUNDRY BECAUSE MOM DIDN’T HAVE TIME TO WASH THEM AND DAD WAS HEADING TO THE CLUB TO PLAY POKER. I THINK THE FATHERS ARE THE ONES THAT NEED THE TRAINING ON HOW TO LOVE. LEARN FROM YOUR WIVES MEN!LOVE COMES IN A LOT OF DIFFERENT COLORS AND I DON’T MEAN SKIN TONES. THERE ARE THOSE IN DIRE NEED OF SOMEBODY TO WRAP THEIR ARMS AROUND THEM AND TELL THEM HOW MUCH THEY LOVE THEM.I RECALL GUYS IN MY CARPOOL SAYING, “I HAVE NEVER WASHED A DIAPER!” I NOT ONLY WASHED THOUSANDS OF THEM BUT I COULD TELL IF THE KIDS NEEDED MORE VEGETABLES BY THE COLOR OF THEIR STOOL, AND I DON’T MEAN THE ONE THEY SIT ON. WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE WHO HAVE TROUBLE INTERACTING WITH THE LITTLE ONES OR THE ELDERLY? THEY ARE THE ONES WHO SHOULD BE CONSTANTLY SHOWERED WITH OUR LOVE AND KISSES!GENTLE GEM FROM GPOP
So helpful!!! Thanks!
When my once brother-in-law was on hospice, I had a friend make personal cards for him—he wanted cards & prayers. However, he passed before my friend gave me her card creations. There were cards that reminded me of his wife & adult children, so I sent a card to each one explaining it was created for him but reminded me of them and how good they were at putting love into action for him. They helped him pass as he wished.Also, I am in cancer treatment, so my husband and I have to socially distance. A friend called because she missed seeing us at church. We told her our wedding anniversary was on my chemo treatment day. She came by that day with anniversary cards from her extended family,, a bouquet of yellow roses and cash. What a wonderful surprise! We were able to get restaurant take out enough for 4 meals for each of us which spared my husband from cooking & doing dishes for a while. Caregivers need care, too.
Share a Bible verse showing God’s love for all mankind , such as the gospel verse of John 3:16. So many verses that show God’s love for His creation of mankind that are in our Bibles.
I have a dear 96 year old friend who is no longer Able to walk. I used to take her to lunch but now she is bed-bound. So on my last visit I told her that I would love to make it a date every Friday afternoon and her face lit up like a Christmas Tree! It doesn’t have to be a long visit, an hour or hour and a half is plenty. More would really tire her out. And it cheers me up, too!
These are all wonderfully thoughtful suggestions and they help!
Just WONDERFUL
Thinking of you dad and hoping you are doing well. I love you. So glad you are strong and battled your way back to healthy. I know you’ll only continue finding the right balance of rest and revolution.
Thank you foe sharing these beautiful thoughts. Take care.
You really need to post more for people whose loved ones are in nursing homes, hospitals or care centers who can not have any visitors. Don’t forget, not everyone can afford a phone or who has a phone with extremely limited minutes.
Thank you for the lovely reminders that although people know we love them, how important it is to show them.
To my dear friend Ellen, you are lovedHope things are going well
Because my son’s immune and respiratory systems are severely compromised right now (he is paraplegic) he prefers e-mails rather than snail-mail. He and his wife especially like digital photos. In the e-mails I tell both my son and his care-giving wife that I admire and love them both.
I bring flowers once a week to my neighbor who is alone and under going chemotherapy
Those were fantastic ideas & a very well written article! Thank u very much. At the moment, I I have someone close to me that is going through Stage 4 ovarian cancer & dealing w the difficulties of chemo, but, dealing w it w humor & an abundance of bravery!
Thanks for an excellent article!!! Appreciate the creative suggestions. Pandemic is keeping us further apart. Just wish my son and daughter would read this.
Very good! Thanks! Don Palmer
All the comments have touched my heart. I am a fan of #1 – the handwritten letter!! I wrote one to my cousin in another State several years ago when he had an unexpected surgery. Years later and throughout, that letter has been a great memory of his and the entire family! In this age of computers = the handwritten note makes quite the impression! At my age, I know of no other kind and enjoy writing them.
I live in Illinois. When my sister (who lives in Florida) was diagnosed with breast cancer I went to Build-a-Bear Workshop and made her a bear with a recording of my voice saying “I love you” in the paw. From time to time I texted her and told her to squeeze the bear’s paw. I also made her a special pillow case using a fabric print in her favorite colors.When a coworker was going in for daily radiation treatments I made her a paper chain of bright colored loops, one for each day of radiation. After each treatment she could tear off a loop for a visual reminder of the progress she was making. I gave her the chain in a gift bag along with two poppers in the shape of a champagne bottle so she and her husband could mark the finish line with a celebration.
Ellen Brant – hang in there! We will get through this together. Virtual hugs for now…real ones coming soon! XO
Great suggestions. Please follow up with corona virus specific suggestions. Many are suffering psychologically as well as physically at this time and need guidance during this challenging time. Thank you.
Thanks, that was helpful!
I think this needs some essential edits in light of corona virus. Oh how I wish we could play a board game and hug our sick loved ones. How to help without harm is really important to getting our folks through these challenging times.
What excellent thoughts and advice!
I had mouth cancer in September and can only eat soup and liquids until this coming August. My daughter, who lives 9 hours from us, sent me 40 lbs.of homemade soup in many flavors. A nephew sent me 15 pints of various flavors of ice cream from an online site. Great surprises.
All the best suggestions. I am widowed and live alone . I am physically challenged and haven’t been out, June will be 6 months. I miss hugs and people. All your suggestions I also use to send others uplifting and positive energies via email or support groups on line. I find helping others also helps me. Namaste!
Most of the time long weekends are great except when your loved one is in hospital, I thought of you both a lot and kept hoping it would go faster for you both! Stay strong Elizabeth you really are doing a excellent job with everything thats on your plate ?? and Bill I can’t be happier with how hard you are working on you getting better??
I learned there is a young mother in my church, with 2 toddlers, and just diagnosed with cancer and beginning chemo. I’ve never met her, but I was enjoying the first cold, sweet watermelon of the season, and it was SO GOOD! This is during Covid, so there is no visiting, hugging, etc, so I asked her if she would like me to bring her a water melon from the farmers market. She excitedly said YES! She would love that. So, the next day I brought one by, and left it on the front porch. Later she told me how she and her husband just sat at the table and dug in, and how much they enjoyed it. So, I’ve offered to go to the farmers market and get her a water melon any time she wants one. So, last week I got a text message…she was ready for another, and a day later, I delivered it. We still haven’t met, but I feel we’ve developed a friendship, and I’m glad she’s not too shy to let me know when she’s ready for another melon. It’s really lifted her spirits and mine, too, and gives us both something to look forward to.
Do you have an idea how long it has been without a hug for people alone during lockdown ??
These are wonderful tips. They are more important than ever during this time of upheaval. I hope that number 7 will soon be back in existence! Meanwhile, rely on the other 6 suggestions to show love and appreciation to friends. Thank you for these suggestions. Sending you “paper hugs.”
This is very good information and something I would usually share with my seniors. However, at this time of self-quarantined and social distancing, the article is not relevant. Would love you to share something about how to stay connected during this time.
When I send an Inspirational Expression God has enabled me to write, the person is blessed. They are not alone in their fight.
I am admittedly biased, since I am a florist, but, we see the positive rewards everyday when we deliver flowers to people for a wide variety of reasons. Especially during this time of pandemic when folks cannot meet in person, we are delivering virtual hugs and creating smiles. It is truly gratifying for us and reason enough to push through the adversity we face.
Thank you, as I have had several people in my life that have needed attention. I guess, as one gets older, this happens more & more.
Sending love to you to help you recover xxxxxxx
thanks!!!!
Excellent suggestions!
#1 is especially a good idea if their medical problem has anything to do with their brain…
I am constantly reminding the medical community of this concerning my wife because even when she was in the hospital I requested paper menus because she would get frustrated when they expected her to choose between things…
I hope you and your family had a great Christmas
My thoughts and prayers are with you
Thankyou for posting 7 helpful ways to show someone you care and there are many other ways too which will arise spontaneously when you find yourself responding to a friend in need. I lost a very dear friend this year. I was unable to visit as we live in different countries but thanks to Caring Bridge we could communicate and Ivwas so grateful you made that possible.
Thank you Caring Bride for all you do for my friend Sally valentine keep helping her. Merry Christmas from Laurie Heber
What great suggestions you have made; thank you
Great thought provokes this time of year and always.
Bless you all from Judy McPhee
Thank you Caring Bridge for all you do. This helps!
Thank you SO MUCH!
Your Christmas card came with your beautiful family! They are such a wonderful blessing to you. It sounds like they are also helping you in many ways! You have spent lots of time with them and now it is their turn to help you. I am sure that they are very helpful to you and they do it with a smile. Dear Kendra, I have thought of your so often during the years, and now I will offer even more prayers for you! You and Joe are loved by so many, and I am one of those people. I often talk to people who have read my book and have given copies to young folks. When you were putting it together, you often told me that you would get up in the middle of the night when your baby needed attention, and write a few words to “Forsake Me Not”. I love you so very much!
In Christian Love,
Phyllis K.
Great ideas. I’m always looking for ways to help
I AM 92 AND I LOVE HUGS AND TO GIVE THEM WHEN EVER I CAN AND WHEN I WRITE TO FRIEND I SEND ALONG A FRIENDSHIP HUG