My incredible husband started this site on my first day of chemo. He wrote the first journal entry and we will share the entries in this journal.
My incredible husband started this site on my first day of chemo. He wrote the first journal entry and we will share the entries in this journal.
My incredible husband started this site on my first day of chemo. He wrote the first journal entry and we will share the entries in this journal.
Who am I? I’m a child of God, a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend, a teacher, a school administrator and now a cancer patient. Not a single one of these characteristics define me but are a part of me. The last of the list was one that I never imagined I would claim to be a part of me.
On March 27th, 2018, I was given my initial diagnosis of colon cancer. The 28th pathology confirmed this dreaded news. My head was swimming and I kept asking myself how did I miss this? Did I ignore symptoms? What happened? I traced back what I now believe are/were symptoms but at the time presented themselves as being related to something else. After significant loss in my life of my father, friends and a precious student over two years, my depression had overcome me. On the outside, I put on the mask but inside I struggled. In December and January I napped/slept a lot. Now, yes, those who know me know I love my sleep, but this was above and beyond the norm. Again, I related it to my depression. The end of January I began to have little to no appetite, sometimes forcing myself to put something into my body so that I could have energy. This was not like me!!! I’m an eater - all emotions deserve food! But I thought my depression had taken on a new level for me. Shortly after, I noticed blood in my stool but not significant enough for me to be concerned. By mid-February I woke with some severe pain under my right rib. I saw my primary physician for this. He believed I had pulled or torn a muscle deep due to a crisis intervention technique I had recently used. That came and went for a few weeks.
After two weeks of experiencing a new and very uncomfortable symptom, I saw the nurse practitioner. I told her of my two weeks of 24/7 indigestion and bloating (almost like I had just eaten a thanksgiving meal for every meal). She went to work scheduling a colonoscopy and endoscopy, blood tests and asked me to complete a test at home. March 21st, that same evening, I was sent to the ER due to more blood in my stool than I had previously experienced. CT scan was completed which showed multiple lesions in my liver. I was sent home with orders to follow up with my primary care physician, which I did the very next morning. It was at this point my “bulldogs” began their work. My nurse practitioner had the colonoscopy and endoscopy scheduled within 4 days. March 27th was the procedure where I received my initial diagnosis, a tumor believed to be cancerous was found in the colon. While my loving husband held me, I sobbed. This wasn’t suppose to be happening. Dr. Cheruku, another bulldog and my gastroenterologist called us in on the 28th to tell us that pathology confirmed the diagnosis. She believed that the lesions in the liver were also cancer and wanted to get me into an oncologist as soon as possible. The initial date she was given to schedule was not good enough for her. After some dialogue, we agreed to move onto another oncologist and I was scheduled in just 6 days. Dr. Cheruku also knew that there would be several tests, including a liver biopsy, the oncologist, Dr. Singh, would need. She scheduled those to be done before my appointment with him.
On April 5th, along with my husband and mom, I met with Dr. Singh. He confirmed our greatest fear....stage 4 colon cancer with liver mets. Tears were shed but I refused to let this diagnosis define me or consume me. That attitude I have carried with me since my diagnosis. So I will be fierce. I will not give up. I will not let this disease consume my life. I refuse to be an average statistic. #befierce
