Rebecca Tawney

Hello, and welcome to my journey...  Though I am one of many, my story is but my own.  I was diagnosed in Dec of 2015 with Invasive Ductal Carcinoma/Stage 2/ HER 2 positive Breast Cancer (estrogen and progesterone negative).  Being diagnosed with  an aggressive Breast Cancer at 39 was not an easy thing to accept.  My husband was serving as an officer in the US Army and I was the homemaker for our beautiful son, Brennen.   We were far away from home in the Midwest and were visiting for the Christmas holiday.  A simple OBGYN visit turned into a mammogram and an instant biopsy for stage 2 Breast Cancer.   My world had seemed to spin into a deep realm of uncertainty and slowly my heart sank with denial and eventually fear of my own mortality.  My diagnose was found in the left breast with a 1cm tumor, with a 2.5 cm insitu in my surrounding tissue which spread into one of my lymph nodes.  The HER 2 receptor cells make my particular Breast Cancer aggressive (likely of reoccurrence).  I named my Cancer tumor Brenda humorously to cope and my goal was to ruin her party that she was partaking in my body.    In Feb of 2016, I had a lumpectomy, and a sennitel lymph node surgery.  I was told two weeks later the margins were not clear (free of cancer cells), and that it had spread to one of my lymph nodes.  A second surgery was successful.  In March, I started my journey of chemotherapy.  I started 2 cycles of Doxetaxol/Carboplatin concoction before my body could no longer handle its evil rath.  I continued with Taxol 4 cycles (weekly).   I have been also taking adjuvant therapy (IV treatment) called Herceptin for 52 weeks.  I have 3 treatments left, but have been told that my heart ejection function has decreased and my heart muscles have weakened significantly.   At this point, my oncologist is saying I may need to lower my dosage, which will force me to take weekly (IV)treatments for 8 weeks.  I am at a crossroads whether to stop for a couple months, in hopes to strengthen my heart muscles and continue the rest of my treatments every three weeks.   I have no port, and one arm that is becoming difficult to get good veins and treatments are becoming painful...at times unbearable. I will soon decide this ...  I struggle with this... partly if I stop the treatment, I risk it coming back but if I continue I may have a stroke or heart attack in the process.  As difficult as this journey is, I am also faced with nodules found in my lungs and esophagus.  The PETSCAN can not confirm Cancer, but shows active cells growing in the nodules. Throughout my journey, I have seen times I never thought I or (my family) would  ever have to endure.  I have lost some friends along this journey and have felt distanced from my own family and son at times and struggled with being seperated geographically from my husband during my treatment.  My faith in the Lord was tested.   Cancer and the evil of chemotherapy strips you down of everything, leaving you so vulnerable, so exposed. I soon found through my own journey that it is "he" that was the only one that did not abandon me through the darkest of times that I have shared.  It is "he" that helped me to not feel alone and brought me loved ones to help open my eyes through my suffering.  Although I still have journeys to endure, and some I may never understand, I am humbled by experience the Lord gave me to be able to document this testimony. I long to reach out to those who are suffering and encourage them hope, love and strength.