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Good morning and God bless. I honestly don't even know where to begin. I have made so wrong turns and bad decisions in my past.. married a navy man who I had children with, moved to Italy in 2005 where the verbal, emotional and mental abuse started...when he got tired if torturing me in those ways, he turned his berating behavior on our daughters...which eventually turned physical...he tried to kill me in front of our daughters in 2011...it took us 3 months to get back to the States...where I was thrown into working 2 jobs just to make ends meet for us 3...and my girls were only 8 and 12. Leaving them home alone wasnty choice, but we had to have a place to live and eat. My oldest daughter got out of control and turned her rage against her little sister and me...she was abusive to her sister and disrespectful to me...things turned very bad and my youngest attempted suicide due to her sisters abuse and feeling like I had too much in my plate with work and her sister and she'd be better off gone...they were 12 andb15... the youngest spent a week in a children's mental hospital and they didn't want to let her leave till they knew she'd be safe. I sent my oldest to live with family...which turned out...not as it should. Family allowed her at 15 to run the show and not live with them...but instead to live with and bounce from friends house to friends house....I had to focus on the youngest and getting her help...the oldest had this hate for us no matter what I tried... counseling, therapy, church... nothing helped, all the while working and trying to keep my own head attached...trying to get divorced from the abusive navy man took 7 years...during which time I have met a wonderful man I truly believe God put in my path. He has been and is an amazing support to my daughters and me...
As many of you know, Raylee dislocated her right knee mothers day weekend, back in 2014! She was placed in a full leg immobilizer, then a full leg cast for 8 weeks, requiring new casts pretty much weekly due to her leg atrophied. She's been through so much with her knee (s). Finally resulting in dual knee braces and surgery in april of 2017. The medical bills have put me in such a bind and yet being home for her apts and follow up care was, has been and will be much needed so full time work has been out of the picture right now...but full time living, eating, and basic needs are full time. I ask for prayers and support in our time of need. Thank you to all.
Raylees 1st knee surgery and recovery was a complete success. We have just gone through her left knee surgery in April 2018...almost a year to the day.... and the same week my mom went in to severe AFIB which landed her in cardiac critical care unit where she had a stroke...I was spreading myself between caring for my daughter and her knee recoveryand my mom and ended up loosing my job...jamie was caring for his granddaughter and my daughter full time....and now neither of us have an income...June was a month of nothing...he found a job and I bounced from my daughter, grandbaby to my mom...and we have yet to catch up on our bills...a home we've worked so hard to buy and provide a safe and happy/loving environment for our family... I have reached out to our local churches and I'm heartbroken to say none have responded or offered so much as a prayer.
I'm afraid of loosing everything including the children...things are not important, money isn't important to us...but it's important to keep a roof over our heads and feed us. I am not asking for a free ride or hand out....I have worked as many as 3 jobs at the same time to make ends meet...but a full month of no income, has really set us back..and taking on this special needs child, has cost us a lot! I know if we can get caught up, we will be fine with God's grace and plans for our future...right now just less than 8 months into owning our home, we have land and several beautiful rescued lil animals...which just fills my heart and brings me closer to God and his beautiful world and blessings.... And they are therapeutic for the baby... we are behind 1 month in our house payment, phone and internet for my daughter to catch up on what she misses during surgery.... is behind 2 months now and we just found out our family vehicle a 04 Saturn Vue needs 4 tires to pass inspection and they are $500...my human heart is scared, worried and broken. My faith is shaken...I've searched for side jobs and nothing that will provide 24hr care for the 3yr old granddaughter, which she requires. We have to get medical for her in our name so we can get her a formal diagnosis and much needed care...
I'm doing anything side job I can just to even provide diapers and toilet paper.... My daughter has opted to do on line school so she can care for the baby during the day, so we can both work.... So we are working on that. But untill then...we are still in a big bind. I'm so worried about loosing everything... Please if there is any sort of advise, assistance or anything else you could point me in the right direction to...I'd be more than grateful.
Thank you for your time and and consideration. I feel hopeless and helpless