Jeff Hayden

First post: Feb 28, 2016 Latest post: Mar 11, 2016

Greetings to all of you who love Jeff and Virginia and want to know how Jeff is doing.  There are so many of us!  For those of you who do not know me, I am a very long-time friend of theirs, whom Virginia has asked to set up this site.

Some of you may not know that Jeff made the decision to stop chemo at the end of January.  The cancer was on the march, so he would have needed to switch to yet a new regimen with tradeoffs for the quality of his life that made no sense to him.  I can report that he was very clear and firm about what he wanted to do, and he has remained at peace with his decision in the subsequent days.  There is absolutely no knowing whether he will now live for days, weeks or months.  

You will be reassured that he and Virginia are receiving support at home from a hospice program. The hope and expectation is that he will receive care at home to his end, though the program does have some inpatient beds if home care becomes too difficult.  Through a separate service, Jeff and Virginia also have the support of wonderful caregivers, who help with Jeff's personal care and some housekeeping tasks.

Jeff is still very much Jeff, funny, warm, and trying to reach out when visitors appear. Nonetheless, his energy and ability to engage in conversation are limited. Finessing his medications to keep his pain under control, which is the ultimate goal, is a constant challenge. 

Thank you for taking this journey with Jeff and Virginia.  It is a good time to be together.

Carol (Thomson)

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