Adele Golub Care for Adele

First post: Mar 10, 2018
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Adele Golub is the 94yr old mother of Evan, her youngest son, with whom i became involved in 2000 ~
Adele & her late husband Eric, lived most of their 65+yr married life in Bellerose, Queens, NY ~ I met them & their other 2 sons & various relatives at their 60th wedding Anniversary party in June 2002 & instantly loved them all !
I was so struck by their open-hearted generosity & they welcomed me into their family ~ As the years passed i spent a lot of time in Bellerose ~ I would would park my camper van in their driveway & shared many meals & stories ~ She & Eric had always been active & fit ~ They went to the gym & swam on a regular basis & on one occasion, i arrived to find Adele cleaning all the windows, aged 86 !
A year after Eric died, Adele decided to sell the family home & took a trip to Maui, HI with Evan to she if might like to live here ~  The decision was easy & she has been here ever since ~ It has always been a pleasure for me to hang out with her anyway, but in the years since she has been on Maui, whenever i am here, which is historically for winter months, outings with Adele are so uplifting & i feel more grateful to know her ! Art shows, music concerts, Craft shows, tea & snacks, sitting at the beach watching the ocean & people all gave/give her so much joy ~ she loves being in the world !
So, apart from a couple of falls that broke a wrist & bruised a  hip & ribs, Adele was in amazing shape & looking 30yrs younger than her age ~ Then, 3yrs ago she had a stroke & lost much use of her left arm &  leg ~ Thankfully, with a lot of physical therapy, she regained some back albeit needing a cane/walker/wheelchair to move around ~ She began to need a lot more care, including help in the night to get up, showering, going to the bathroom, dressing, etc & Care Aides were hired~ All through it she was sweet & gracious & so grateful for the help ~
Then a move had to be made 2 years ago & one of the Elder Care Aides & her Husband & family kindly took her into their home as a temporary stay while a longer term situation was worked out ~ she has been there ever since ~ She has been treated like their own kin by this wonderful family ~ Christina & Artu & their 3 youngest children, (2 of whom are being home-schooled), 2 grandchildren & various dogs & cats have wrapped Adele in a cocoon of love, care & warmth & attention ~ she is called "Grandma Adele" & she has thrived wonderfully in this environment ~
About 6 weeks ago, while i was in CA with my daughter, Adele had a second stroke ~ i went to be with her last Saturday & was sad to see the decline ~ Barely able to talk/be understood, not seeing very well, didnt show she recognized me (though gave a little smile when i said that i loved her:)) & sleeps a lot ~ she needs all food to be pureed, attended to 6-8 times night, mainly sits in her wheelchair listening to music (she is really into Abba now) & napping in the day ~ however she does ask "whats happening"  & "when are we going out" with some repetition when she in an awake mode !
So, as you can imagine all of this time the money was dwindling fast & now apart from the social security & small pension the current situation has brought me to reach out to the community for help ~
Christina & Atu have both always worked to cover their expenses & now they are basically not able to afford continuing to care for Adele without the supplement that had been given to cover their costs & time ~ Christina is now in training to take on a new elder care patient, doing 12hr night & monthly 36hr shifts in his home a few miles away ~ Then she is going to come home & care for Adele during while Atu & the eldest daughter, who is also  a trained care aide, are at work ............
I am blown away by their benevolence, love & care ~