Journal
Sunday, July 5, 2009 8:45 AM, CDT
Another 4th of July without my Trent. At least I'm working all weekend; I'll never ever forget last year when Dawn and I, just only us two, got together because we couldn't stand to be with anyone else...tears........
I stopped to see my Trenny on my way home from work this morning; Kelsey had been out there yesterday and put the flags around his grave. Then I come home and the front page of the StarTribune is a lady (monster) who threw her two 14 month old twins off a bridge 6 years ago on July 4th and it was 'her' story. How SICK is that? I spent years trying to keep my baby alive and this so-called person threw her kids off a bridge? I called to cancel my paper, why is that front page news? She should be on death row! And I don't want to see that on the front page of my paper that I only get to get my coupons...
My boy, my baby, MY TRENT!!! I miss you so much, it still hurts bad if not worse, I want you back PLEASE. Instead, my little baby, my BOY, my only boy is rotting underground.
I watched the DVD of the Hooked On Fishing show that filmed us when we were in Tampa for his Wishes & More trip, I could hear his voice, his giggles when he caught fish, his excitement. Bill Miller is the owner of the show, a fisherman and more importantly, an advocate of Children's Cancer Research. His statistics would make anyone cry, how CCR is SO underfunded. In fact, the protocols that Trent was on were over 10 years old! The only thing that can save these beautiful children from dying is donating to research, and Trent would still be here today if there was more research, better protocols for treatment. Tyler would still be here, Isaac would still be here, Ella would still be here, Mariah would still be here and I could go on and on and on.... please put your CB website on the guestbook if you have lost a precious child, people just don't understand the magnatude of cancer affecting children.
I know people have more important things to do than be on CaringBridge, but if you look around here? you'd see all the little children fighting for their lives, then dying. They slowly die right in front of their Mom's and sisters and brothers and there is nothing we can do. I'm supposed to be a Mom and Mom's are supposed to protect their children and I couldn't do a damn thing! Talk about feeling like a failure...
Thanks for reading this, I just needed to let this off my mind. Holidays are tough, all of them
Don't forget PLEASE!! Linda has worked SO HARD for Isaac's Foundation, and for what? No one would ever think that THEIR child would be diagnosed with cancer till it happens to them.
http://www.isaacsfoundation.org/files/2009_Brochure.pdf
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Our home address: 3642 Kolstad Rd Eagan MN 55123;
