Today is the second anniversary of Savanna’s home-going. I still have moments of disbelief. At times I catch myself thinking I have to ask Savanna that. The longing -- to talk with her, to hear her laugh, to see her smile, to feel her hug- is always with me. This sense of longing for her doesn’t seem to diminish and probably never will.
People have told me I am strong. It’s hard to explain how feeling a deep sense of loss and being truly happy can live side by side in the same mind and body. If I wasn’t living it, I wouldn’t believe it could be possible. I know the joyful side comes from the Lord. That’s where I get the strength and courage to face each new day. I miss Savanna beyond words, I still have problems, and I am still a sinner who says, thinks, and does wrong things, but my relationship with God is now very personal.
It helps to know that Savanna is living happy and carefree without any suffering from cancer. I enjoy listening to Alan Jackson’s song “Sissy’s Song.” Although sad, it leaves me with a smile. I hope you smile too.
She flew up to Heaven on the wings of angels
By the clouds and stars and passed where no one sees
And she walks with Jesus and her loved ones waiting
And I know she's smiling saying
Don't worry 'bout me
Thanks for the continuous support that started when Savanna was diagnosed with leukemia. Thanks for supporting my efforts in the Relay for Life that’s coming up in July. Quilt tickets are available through that night.
Love, Jayne
SMILE :)