Some days are better than others!!!!!

It catches me off guard many times...the emotional roller coaster of life after such a loss due to cancer. Certain songs, colors, dates on a calendar and many times for reasons unknown I find myself feeling great sadness. I was thinking the other day that Nathan would be turning 15 in October and he would probably be planning out some strategy to get himself a car---planning the style and color. He always found the Hummer (Yellow) to be one of his favorite cars; he also liked the prowler (red). I have just found myself thinking of him more often lately.

Marissa is counting down the days to the end of school-- I think Lee is too. He just got home from senior trip today and is ready for some rest and relaxation.

Mother's Day is upon us-- Happy Day to all the moms out there! The last mother’s day card Nathan gave me sits on my dresser and occasionally I just open it and remember his laughter. I jumped like I had been shot when the song started to play. He had Lee search all of Minneapolis for this specific Hallmark card. I love to look at his hand writing and remember our shopping trip to the Mall of America where he took me to the jewelry store to buy a ring he saw in the paper. What a day it was.

This mother’s day Marissa is planned a special meal of Shredded wheat, cotton candy yogurt, pickles and root beer. I hope to work on the menu a bit, since I only care for the cereal. We will spend Mother's Day at a family fish fry--YUM!

Please remember all of those on this cancer journey; it is something that you never fully recover from. Even those who achieve remission never go back to life as before---the fear of relapse, the scars of childhood lost and realization that all we have is now changes your life forever.