Meghan Herndon's Journal
Sept 20, 2013
Written Sep 20, 2013 12:55amWelI as I have know all day that this time would hit, and the pit in my stomach is very noticeable as it was a year ago. Feeling the same as i did a year ago, I am unable to sleep. This time last year I was praying for a miracle and watching every breath Meghan took, gently touching her warm cheek, and running my fingers through her curls, oh how I ache to do that again tonight. Instead I am trying to figure out how to get through the day and all the emotions. I have been trying to put to paper what I am going to share at the game tonight at Cape, and I realized as I wrote the list of things how many things because of Meghan have gone on in one year. It truly is a long list that simply makes me wonder how could all of these things happen or influenced somebody over the past year??? We have to believe our curly red headed angle with be with us tomorrow and helping guide us thru the day.
I cannot say enough thoughts of appreciation to all that have reached out just with kinds words and just simply to let me know we are in your thoughts. It is still so amazing to me the impact Meghan had on life and the stories that have been shared. It is things like: because of Meghan I did... In honor of Meghan I did... Thank you for Meghan ... I knew I could do it because Meg was with me... I did not know Meghan but she inspired me to .... I am wearing my seat-belt now because of Meghan.. I have signed my drivers license to be an organ donor.. I have a new tattoo... (That may include me)
I miss her terribly and have many days I wonder how does one keep getting up to face the same empty ache in my heart and soul, but something in her lives in me and we get thru the day. Some days are better than others, meaning less tissues than other days. I have to say I have an amazing support group of family and friends and I don't know how I would do it without that support. I appreciate all of you..
I am going to close and see if I can shut my mind off for a few hours, I know easier said than done. I remember trying to this while we sat in the hospital night after night. I will be looking for all the signs she will give me tomorrow to let me know she is OK and scoring more goals that she ever did....
Love to all
Ps this is my last photo with Meg
Written Sep 16, 2013 8:22pm
Monday, Sept 16
Written Sep 16, 2013 8:16pmSo, I know it has been a few days. Just seemed every time I found the time or strength to write I would get distracted. Yesterday was a weird day and I think Meg was giving me some weird signs. Visited the cemetery and placed flowers in her vases. I am mentally trying to prepare for Friday as I know this will be a day remembering those emotions when my heart and soul gained a constant empty feeling it has so become accustomed to. I know I am not the only one feeling these emotions and we all miss her terribly and it is truly healing and brings a smile to my face to hear from others at this time.
I am struggling today to find the words to write so maybe best I leave it as it is right now. Hoping to see a lot of familiar faces this Friday in Cape at the SEMO Alumni game and retiring of Meg's Number #2. Start time is 7pm.