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Days Go By (in Pain)

The days go by and I'm looking towards the future...no one knows what the future holds, or what kind of news I'll be getting at my final appt (final exam and set surgery date) on the 12th- but one thing I know is I'm beginning to look forward to surgery being done. My life right now is filled with agony- pain all over the inside of my entire abdomen each time I take a bite or sip of something. I have lost more weight and know I'm fading. The surgery will help me get to where I need to be, so I am finally accepting it (or beginning to anyways). 

I called my surgeon on Thursday and the nurse called back. I asked what my test results were from the gastric emptying study and the fluoroscopy small bowel series- she said she isn't able to tell me and the surgeon needs to be "face-to-face" to give me the final results and also told me it's a lot to go over and I asked "should I be concerned? Is it bad?" And she said I really need to sit down with the surgeon and he will go over everything with me.....I have to admit, I was concerned, but being God's child, I HAVE to trust in Him and let Him hold me up and not get wrapped up in being scared. I'm scared sometimes, but mostly in too much pain and too weak to be too scared. 
I pray I get seen sooner than the 12th because I'm on sooooo many meds- 8 total that don't do much other than cause side effects. A new medicine is Marinol (a federally approved drug) used for cancer and HIV patients to help them eat...if it will get me to eat, I will absolutely try it. I'm almost certain that I have GASTROPARESIS (they told me my stomach is VERY slow to empty (also called gastroparesis)...I'm certain of it, because my stomach is always full of food and the times I do vomit, I let out stuff from yesterday. They noticed my stomach barely opens to let food into my intestines- it was a tiny droplet instead of a steady flow of food. I'm pretty sure I finally pinpointed my upper belly pain. Now the bottom half has to be explained. 
Just wanted to update. I've been in bed and hardly able to move, so I've had no energy to log on, but here's my update and more to follow. 
God bless my friends and followers for reading my updates and following my story. May you all find hope if you or someone you know is battling with chronic illness.