I took Kira to the Back-to-School picnic today (technically yesterday). It was a rush of mixed emotions as I reminisced last year when Lucas was there with us. He was playing with his preschool friend and they were running around. His friend was showing us how fast he could run. Lucas wanted to make us proud so he also showed us how he could run fast. It was a big deal because he hardly ran. When he did, he had a slight limp and was quickly winded. After the initial treatment, he was in physical therapy to help build muscle strength in his legs and abdomen. Though he needed to continue PT, we stopped to address something more pressing - his relapse. I hope Lucas knew that we were always proud of him - running or not. Thank you Kirsten for remembering and reminding me of that hopeful day. Never would I have thought that I would be at the same picnic without him this year.

I'm a visual person so as we approach the one year mark of Lucas' death the image that comes to mind is a loop near completion. This loop will serve as the center, representing memories of Lucas' last year alive. I hope as time goes on, it continues to expand with resurfaced memories; never closing despite moving further out from the date of occurrence. This is one spiral I wish to be endless.

Thank you for continuing to think of Lucas.