We apologize for the delay in an update. (we have added new pictures of Kaden) Everything we are experiencing is excruciating and hard to put in words. As a mother I have constantly questioned if we have done the right things and battle the guilt that I can’t fix this for Kaden. Then God gently reminds that I am not in control, He is. Even when I think I am in control it is only because God is allowing it at the time. My heart breaks for Kaden and how hard this is for our family.
Kaden held his own for quite some time and the natural things we have tried have definitely given him some more quality time with us. The last few weeks have shown decline in some areas for Kaden which is so saddening to us. Although Kaden continues to talk and remains so funny, his left side continues to weaken. He still tries to crawl, but often falls as his left arm doesn’t always hold him up. He has become tired more often and eating is continually harder for him. He can no longer see out of his right eye, likely as a defense mechanism from the brain as it appears that he was seeing double for awhile. He is such an incredibly tough kid. He perseveres through it all and never complains. He still has an occasional fit when things are hard for him and understandably so. He so badly wants to walk and has us help him to do so. His favorite thing lately is his Thomas the Train set. It brings him much joy and even with limited mobility and the use of only one hand, he still pushes the trains around hour after hour. Mom and Dad are also quite tired of watching Thomas the Train on t.v. , but will gladly do it for Kaden. He is such a joy to our lives and has taught us so much in his short little life.
Just to clarify things, we met again with Kaden’s doctor here in Minneapolis to ask about what our previous surgical options were. At the point that Kaden’s tumor had tripled in volume she had shared the MRI with all of Kaden’s other doctors. All of the doctors had agreed at that point that the tumor was too large and too wrapped around vitals areas of the brain stem to be able to do surgery without severe injury and extreme disabling conditions for Kaden if he would even make it through surgery. Another round of radiation would have been unlikely in Kaden’s case also due to the area of previous radiation. As Kaden’s mom, this news was so heart breaking to hear again, yet I needed to know that we have done all that we can. Ultimately we understand that God has led, we have listened, and He is in control. We still pray for a miracle but try to accept what it is that God has willed in our situation. We try to prepare, but really can’t. We try to discuss the future, but usually cry. Mostly, we just love Kaden up and build as many memories as possible.
We have been challenged by a sermon we heard that addresses difficult times in life. When times are toughest that is when our praise and honor of God can be most visible. We have been told numerous times that our faith is evident and that we are strong. We firmly attest it is God and God alone who has gotten us through each and every moment of this difficult struggle. We are no stronger than anyone is without God’s grace and power in our lives. To Him be praised for his mercy. Pray that we continue to rely on him through the rest of this journey.
Thank you again for all the prayers, support and numerous acts of kindness from Nebraska, Minnesota and more. We love you all.
Please pray for strength and protection for our family. Please pray for peace that passes all understanding. Please pray for strength for each moment and each day and that we would rely on God’s grace to get us through.
John 16:33"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.
