Jacob Taylor's Journal
Written Jan 14, 2011 2:39am
It's hard to believe that in just a week it will be 10 months that he's been gone. In some ways it feels like it's been forever since I've hugged him, but at the same time it feels like it was just yesterday that he was here. I do know he's with me though, and still has his sense of humor. His favorite thing to do is wake me out of my sleep whenever there is something on the tv or music he wants me to hear. I figured this out the first time he did it after I fell asleep watching Food Network, and was jolted awake to find them doing a show on oysters in New Orleans.
If you remember, Jacob and I made the trip down there last February to attend his cancer buddy, Pirate Ben’s funeral. It was a sad reason to be down there, but at the same time he and I had so much fun and made so many memories that I will cherish forever. One of those memories was while we were eating at this seafood place down by Bourbon Street. Their “specialty” was oysters, and Jacob tried one and then tried talking me in to eating one but I refused. It was a joke between us from then on that I needed to try them, and I'd always tell him I wasn't eating something that had the consistency of snot. When I nearly jumped out of bed startled at 3 in the morning to find this show on the Food Network, I knew it was him.
I also know he has maintained his sense of humor by the numerous times I've found his football "cup" around the house. I would always yell at him to put that thing away in his drawer because he did what every 8/9 year old does and just left it where he was finished with it. The first few times I thought nothing of it, but it continues to happen and in different parts of the house. I can just hear him giggling every time I find it. A "sign" like that is just so Jacob.
Anyways, I didn't come here to just post about the various inside jokes he and I had, I wanted to share some exciting things going on in our world right now for those who may not know.
My mom and I have started a foundation in Jacob's memory in hopes of helping other families of children diagnosed with brain cancer. Thanks to a wonderful donation from Jacob's fellow skydiver Travis, we have a lawyer working on getting us an official 503(c)3 status, and hope to be helping families by late summer. The website for the foundation is www.TeamJacobFoundation.org. You can also follow us on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/Team-Jacob-Foundation/100772943321128.
The other exciting news is I am part of the 2011 Class of 46 Mommas. If you saw Stand Up 2 Cancer when it was on back in September, you may have seen the group of 46 moms at the beginning who shaved their heads in honor/memory of their child with cancer. I am part of the group of 46 moms who will be shaving this year.
You may be wondering what the significance of 46 is? Every day, approximately 46 children are diagnosed with cancer. Us moms are shaving our heads by choice, because at some point in our lives we were mom to one of those 46 children who didn't have a choice - about losing their hair to radiation or chemo, about getting poked and prodded...who didn't have a choice about getting cancer.
On September 13, 2011, I will be traveling to Washington DC to join 45 other women as we shave our heads and bring awareness to childhood cancer. We are also doing this to help raise funds for the St. Baldrick’s Foundation, which provides money for research of childhood cancer. Many people have asked why we are doing this in September when it's just starting to get cold. September is significant because it's Childhood Cancer Awareness month, and September 13th is Childhood Cancer Awareness Day. Even though my head will be cold come fall, I can't think of a better time of year to do this and bring more awareness to childhood cancer.
Please visit my page on the 46 Mommas website and PLEASE consider making a donation to help me reach my goal (there is a link to my St. Baldrick's page where you can make a donation under my name) : http://46mommas.com/index.php?option=com_k2&view=item&id=269:tiffany-taylor&Itemid=163
Jacob's page has been visited over 90,000 times. If people donated just $2 each time they visited, that would be enough money to fund a clinical trial for childhood cancer. Even if you can't afford to donate, spreading the word about the 46 Mommas is worth millions! I have a Facebook page set up to keep people updated on my shave, so please like it and share with your friends:
I'm attaching the picture of Jacob from this time last year as we were on our way to see the Patriots play the Ravens in Boston. The Patriots were his favorite football team, and I'm so glad we were able to take him to Boston to see them play in person. Hopefully Brady does better this year than he did at the game we attended. Go Pats!!
I also wanted to send a huge thanks to someone I haven't ever properly thanked. Jen from Cakewrecks.com was such a huge supporter of Jacob and helped spread the word about his fight. She will always hold a special place in my heart for that! If you need a good laugh, visit cakewrecks.com and show some love! Thank you, Jen!!
Written Aug 17, 2010 8:27pmToday would have been Jacob's 10th birthday. I seem to miss him more and more with each passing day, and still pray this is all just a bad nightmare I'll wake up from. The kids and I are spending this week in Mammoth Cave, KY, and as soon as we got settled in the condo, a rainbow appeared in the sky. I know it was his way of telling me he's with us.
I wanted to post the eulogy I had intended to give at his funeral (of course being me, I forgot to bring my computer to read it).
I've been writing his eulogy in my head for 10 months now. Ever since we got the grim diagnosis on May 19th, I've been running things through my head that I wanted the world to know about him. I just wish I would have put some of them down on paper because there are so many wonderful things about Jacob that I'm not going to remember to tell you about right now.
When you have kids, you plan to show them the world. Show them all the things you've always loved, and let them discover adventures of their own. When you get a diagnosis of DIPG, you're told you have about 9 months. Just 9 months to teach them all the lessons you had planned to spend a lifetime teaching them. 9 months to experience the world with them.
I held on to hope that Jacob would beat this, but in my heart I knew that wasn't God's plan, so we packed a lifetime of memories in to those last 10 months I had with him. He got to fish in Alaska, be on the ground crew for a skydiving team, cheer on the UC football team from the sidelines, and then see them get creamed in the Sugar Bowl (but hey, we were in New Orleans that in itself was an experience). He got to see an NFL playoff game and be five rows back from his hero, Tom Brady.
And then there were all the little moments. The times he and I would just hang out together. We'd go to the little coffee shop down the road from our house, and sit for hours just playing on our computers or Ipods. Or the moments in the car where we'd carry on deep conversations and I'd forget that he was just a 9 year old little boy. He was wise beyond his years.
I also want to share something I found on his computer a couple of months after he passed (if you're on facebook, you may have read this when I posted it after I found it). I knew he had been writing something back in February, but had no clue it was something like this...
mom is the best in the whole wide world
she is the best mom
shes the jacket on a cold winter morning
shes the blossom of the flowers in the summer
shes the coffe for you on your way to work at 5:00 in the morning shes water in the waterpark
shes the shoulder you put your head on when your girlfreind breaks up with you
shes the punishement when you done something wrong
shes the lesson you learn too,
shes the float in your root beer float,
shes the niceest mom in the whole wide world
shes like a dream that was always there for you
shes the happy thought to calm you down when you are sad
when you get cought up in something shes the one to get you untangled
This was another file I found at the same time:
mommies the best in the whole wide world to cuddle with like nathan is very helpful to me this is the best familie i could have in the whole wide world
mom can cuddle with you and calm you in a magical way like no one can
shes the most wonderful thing that ever happened to me nathan is a big help to me and mommy me
Mommie is the the water to float your boat
she is ice cream in your sundae
she is the creaminess in your sundae when you want ice crem and shes the knumming cream to numb your skin when you get that ivy or port
she is the cuddle when you want to cuddle
shes the blanket when you are cold
Happy birthday, buddy!! I know you're having a great party up there (if you can pull yourself away from the video games long enough). I love you and miss you like crazy!
Written Mar 26, 2010 6:55pmWe will be having a memorial jump for Jacob tomorrow at Hook Field in Middletown, Ohio at 11:30am. I will be jumping, and then the skydiving team will be doing their ceremonial flag jump in honor of Jacob.
If you aren't able to make it, WCPO Channel 9 news is supposed to be there unless it's a busy news day.
Here's a link that should hopefully get you directions: