Hello everyone!

It's been awhile but wanted to update everyone on a few things.

First of all, continued thanks for your support through everything. While days are pretty "normal" as far as this new "normal" goes, there are those regular reminders that keep Aug. 1, 2007 top of mind. And there are a few places that still make me feel raw and grab at my breath, like being downtown near the collapse site or at HCMC, where I was yesterday. I was back at the Ear, Nose and Throat clinic to get my nose checked out. Recently I began having phantom smells. A few weeks ago I began "smelling" this odor of hot grease. It was pungent at times, to the point that it made me very uncomfortable and nauseated. Over time it has subsided greatly, but I wanted to get it checked out. The doctors said it was extremely rare and there was no cure for it. I can only hope it doesn't come back.

As I sat in the lobby waiting for the appointment, I recalled my first visit to that doctor's office. Ma had wheeled me up there from Stepdown ICU. I sat in the wheelchair for what seemed like an eternity waiting to be seen. The discomfort and pain from sitting upright for so long was intense. I was hooked up to a heart monitor and other tubes that made hauling me around a pain. I looked over at the spot where I had sat in that wheelchair a year and three-quarters ago and tears welled up in my eyes. I fought hard to draw them back because I didn't want everyone in the packed lobby to think I was emotionally unbalanced (see: crazy). It was hard to think back to that time when I was at Step 2 or 3 of my recovery and comparing it to now. It's like it was a light year away and a second ago, all at the same time.

How far have I come physically? In addition to my sense of smell being gone, my ankle is still sore from time to time, my balance has never fully recovered, and I lose my balance a lot (I'm screwed if I ever get pulled over and have to take a sobriety test!), but...

I'm doing a lot that I used to do. In fact, I joined not one, but TWO, softball leagues this summer! Sure, I've lost a step and I throw like a girl who just stepped off of a Tilt-A-Whirl, but all in all I consider that a huge accomplishment. So - I take it as a big blessing.

There has been so much blessing, and I have to be reminded of that when I have bad days - when I get angry, frustrated and irritable when I think about all these steps I've had to undertake because a bridge that should have never fallen did. And I have lots of bad days. But more good news:

Sonja and I are closing on a house a week from Friday! It's an exciting time and a scary one as well. I've never owned a home before, and will likely be Googling things like "killing weeds" and "installing a sump pump." We will be moving to Andover on the north side of the Cities.

I hope everyone is having a great spring.

God Bless,
Garrett