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By Gary Edwards — Jul 23, 2014 1:06pm

Roy,

You numbers of chemos, recurrences, surgeries , et al , are hauntingly similar to a path that our family walked and fortunately we live in a very sweet season now. My sincere prayers are that all of the Knickman's can taste that same sweet season one day. Keep pressing on and we'll keep lifting Emma, and all four of you, up in prayer for God's infinite grace.


much love,


The Edwards

By MARY CALLENDER — Jul 23, 2014 4:00am


DEAR EMMA,  STAY STRONG,RESTED AS YOU CONTINUE YOUR FIGHT WITH HOPE, FAITH, BELIEF AND ENCOURAGEMENT.

WANTED TO SHARE WITH YOU NICK'S STORY AS HIS DOCTOR THINKS OUTSIDE THE BOX:

Nick's Epic Battle to Defeat Osteosarcoma
Yesterday was tough, and we have some very big decisions to make. We met with the surgeon team to discuss what the next step will be if the chemo is working. They believe the cancer has taken over the pleural lining in Nick's lungs, causing the multiple reoccurances. They believe they will continue reoccur unless they remove Nick's left lung. After they remove the lung, they will remove the chest cavity (ribs and all), the cavity would then be flooded with a heated chemo therapy to cleanse the area where the lung was removed and then reconstruct the ribs with prosthetic parts. There would be a very strong possibility he could be on oxygen all his life with this procedure. It is a procedure they say is completely out of the box. We asked the surgeon would he do this on his kid. There was a very long silence, he emotionally said, "I have never been in your shoes and can honestly say I wouldn't want to be. As a parent, I would say yes, but know this is extremely risky." He also skipped around the quality of life. So I just asked him, "Are you trying to say his quality of life has a good chance it wouldn't be good? " "Yes, we are completely out of the box here." Options? Stop every thing and live like every day is it's last, or take the risk. Nick struggling while trying to digest all of it. He obviously will have a major part in this decision. He still has a lot of life he wants to live and it is really being put on the line at this point. Decisions no one should ever have to make, for themselves or for a loved one. The next few weeks should be interesting. Having his doggy here last night could not have come at a better time for sure. This morning he asked to go explore to get his mind off it, so exploring we will go. Please pray for guidance and wisdom as we begin this new chapter.

Copyright, Nick's Epic Battle to Defeat Osteosarcoma

By Shelley Verses — Jul 23, 2014 12:48am

Hi Emma! Have you gone swimming yet this summer? I bet that would help refresh you:) You deserve to feel refreshed and rejuvenated everyday lovey. When you feel more energetic, come up, until then give me a call and I'll fill you in on all the scoop! I love you and miss you.
love, Shelley xo

By Candida Stoutenborough — Jun 9, 2014 7:36pm

Dearest Roy, Deb, Emma, and Bo:  Life has not been an easy road for any of you.  You all have been put to the test with huge circumstances to deal with.  First, I am so happy to hear about Emma's clear scans.

Emma, you are on remarkable person.  You have endured more than anyone I know.  Your strength and perseverance through cancer was a huge mountain in front of you...you needed to climb it, bike it, (whatever) to get over it.  And now you have shared with the community about your struggle all theses years that you are a transgender.  You had a mountain in front of you that was twice the size that none of us knew about...lets just say the alps) and you were trying to scale all that by yourself!

Now it is your time Emma.  You have clear scans and you have scaled the alps (without hurting yourself and coming completely unglued).  The strength you possess goes beyond what anyone can imagine.  It also tells me that you TRULY ARE very strong, smart, beautiful, talented, and I suspect you will conquer any challenge put before you.  I believe you are destined to do great things Emma.  You look so happy and at peace in the these pictures.

Peace, love, and blessings (as always)
Candy Stoutenborough

By Aunt Jeri — Jun 6, 2014 10:35am

Dearest Emma,
I am so proud of you! I have always been impressed by your courage and strength with your fight with cancer,
 I am even more so knowing you were battling an even deeper struggle. You are beautiful,inside and out. I can see that peace has come over you in your photo. I can't wait to see you and give you a big hug.
 You have my abiding love and support.

By Suzette Ayotte — Jun 5, 2014 11:51pm

Emma, 
Your strength and courage, and the strength of your Dad and Mom and Bo, will never ever cease to amaze me.  I can only imagine how difficult it has been to count your blessings throughout your journey, particularly over the last four years, but you have been blessed with an incredibly supportive and unconditionally loving family and community.  You still are. Nothing has truly changed - other than for the better -  and that is I am certain, the feeling of an incredible weight being lifted from your shoulders, a sense of freedom, and as Gary said, a renewed sense of strength. Thank you for sharing. That took more courage than most of us will ever possess in our lifetime. I am, and always will be, in awe. 

I really want to know if you ever read that book that I sent to you: Illusions, the Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah. In some ways, I think it will be even more meaningful. I've read that book several times throughout my life and - honestly, it's time for me to pick it up again.  It's just one of those books with messages of multi-meanings and interpretations, depending on life's circumstances. Sounds heavy, but it's not. It's actually very simple.  Let me know if you've read it and I'll try not to be too bummed out if you have not. Surely you have the courage to tell me, eh?  If you haven't, please give it a shot. I think you'll like it and you might even love it. 
Your pal, 
Suzette

By Shelley Verses — May 20, 2014 1:10pm

Hi Andreas and Roy,
Our wonderful cycling family were sending you both lots of hellos and well wishes during the Amgen Tour of California! I hope you have energy enough to enjoy some poker nights and have some fun with your friends.
Adam and I think of you everyday. I love you Andreas, love, Shelley
xo