Today was weird for a couple of reasons. First we decided that it was time to pack up Aleena’s things from her room. I have been thinking about this for a while. Tormenting thoughts about tornados striking the house and completely destroying everything of hers have had me in a panic at times. That’s not to say what the other thoughts about fire and flood have done, but for some reason I have been more worried about those stupid tornados. Irrational I know but there none the less. So having her things safely packed away helps a little. It was hard though. There have been a lot of confusing thoughts over the last year as to how you’re supposed to go about something like this. Do you clean the stuff up right away, do you close the room off, do you allow anyone in, and is there a set time limit? No one knows because for everyone it will be different. That at least I do know. We did what we had to do for us. We did tell the kids that if there was anything of hers that they wanted to keep, to go on in and get it. If they felt like hanging out in there they were able to. For the most part though they stayed out. They did pick things out, but those as well stayed in the room too. One of those parental moments when you really hope that on a road that no one has a map to we haven’t steered our children to wrong.
Our time in her room was filled with both laughter and tears. Tears for obvious reasons. Seeing things we hadn’t seen in so long that brought back so many memories. Realizing just how many hats she really had! Oh the hats she had. And all the crafts! Oh my! We found some journal type entries. Those were hard and yet left us so curious at the same time. They start and either don’t finish or aren’t totally clear as to what or who she was talking about or to. I found this little craft project of hers. It was where she could write a little message and stick it in a little bottle, put a top on it and put it on a ribbon. She could then decorate the ribbon with beads and such. On the ribbon she had spelt out "wish." I, thinking I am going to find something prophetic or read a letter to myself or something, get the little piece of paper out and read a declaration to someone I had never heard of before! Leo and I had a good laugh at that one.
It never ceases to amaze me just how much you can stuff into a room too. Even though we thought that room was clean, boy was there a lot of stuff to take out. Isabel is now in there. That had been the plan all along. It is meant to have a little girl in there. She is excited to have her own space again and was eager to get all her things where she wanted them. We left a lot of the stuff the same. The walls obviously, the curtains, the bed, the sheer hanging over the closet. She wanted to keep the canopy over the bed and the pretty chandelier as well. We did go out and buy her a new bed set and she has all her knick knack stuff, books, radio and stuffed animals all moved in. I am keeping my fingers crossed but am pretty sure this is the cleanest we will ever see it!
I mentioned that today was weird for a couple of reasons. We decided to do the room today totally out of the blue. Yes I have been thinking about it, but didn’t have a set date, just got up and did it. Well during the cleaning the door bell rings and we get a package. Leo asks me if I was expecting anything and I tell him no at least not until next week. As soon as I saw the box I knew exactly what it was. Aleena’s guestbook online through the paper went off line on April 27th and we ordered the book from it. I was not supposed to get it though until next week. A little strange. A little later as I was taking a break I took a look at the mail and there is a letter addressed to Aleena. Yep. Open it up and it is a progress note from a neurology visit from December of 2007. I was willing to let the book thing go, but this was too weird!!
May is brain tumor awareness month.
In June we will be participating in A Time to Fly with Children’s Cancer Research Fund. Our team name is "Heaven’s Angels" and so far we are partnered up with Brooke and have plans for our friend Meg to join the group. We would love to have anyone join us for this very important cause. If you would like to join our team, create a team of your own or donate please visit http://www.ccrftimetofly.com/
I still follow a couple of families here and they could use some extra prayers. We think of them often and pray for their children and families.
Zack: http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/zacharywhite
Avery: http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/averygallagher
Katelyn: http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/katelynbuscher
