Sarah Swaim

Sarah, Camp Counselor, with Campers at Camp Fantastic 2009
Sarah was diagnosed with Acute Biphenotypic Leukemia in July 2003, and completed her treatment in March of 2005. She has been in remission since September 2003.

Journal

Saturday, June 5, 2010 9:37 PM CDT

Well, this just blows.

I come to you all with devastating news that has rocked our hearts and left us all speechless.

It's back. No more cured. No more thoughts of care-free days. I went in for my annual check-up feeling great. In fact, I don't think I've ever felt better. It's summertime, I had a job working with children, I could drive my little honda civic to the bay for sunsets whenever I wanted... I was truly without a care in the world.

My visit was going great til Dr. O pulled me aside and led me into an exam room telling me they found leukemia cells in my blood. The first words I could utter were "Are you joking?!" I just couldn't believe it. He then said, "I wouldn't joke about something like this." and started crying. I could really see how much it was breaking his heart that he had to break mine. My heart and my world.

We did a bone marrow biopsy Friday to see just what we were dealing with and while we are waiting for some more test results it looks like it's the same as before. Both ALL and AML. The "game plan" at the moment is chemo til they're satisfied that I'm in remission and then a transplant of some sort. Bone marrow or stem cell we do not know. Duke or MCV we do not know. I go in for surgery on Tuesday for them to put in a CVL (more permanent IV) and to take out one of my ovaries to harvest because during the transplant I'll be having full body radiation, which could prevent my ovaries from producing eggs after all is said and done.

This is unfair. It ruins all of my plans. I will not be going to school in the fall. I'm taking the semester off. I want to be able to have kids. I want to laugh and smile and paint my new room in the townhouse with my 3 friends back at school. I'm unhappy and pissed and can only sob at random times in fits.

I did go to the bay with my boyfriend Patrick tonight and will probably go tomorrow evening and Monday too for the sunsets. They're beautiful.

Please keep me and my family in your thoughts and prayers. We're all devestated and having a hard time with this.

<3 Always,
Sarah

PS. We will be creating a new caringbridge site as this one is on the "classic" system. The new site will be
www.caringbridge.org/visit/sarahswaim please look for future updates there or subscribe to email notifications.

Read Journal History

Hospital Information:

Patient Room: at home

2432 Laurel Cove Drive
Virginia Beach, VA 23454
757 - 496- 3434

Links:

E-mail Author: mvswaim@cox.net

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