Miss Ashley's Page ***PLEASE SIGN THE GUESTBOOK***

***PLEASE SIGN OUR GUESTBOOK****
Welcome to Ashley's Web Page. It has been provided to keep all of you updated. Check often I will keep this up to date with all information on her tests. Please sign her guest book too!! We enjoy seeing the notes of encouragment and all of the prayers going out to her. Ashley was diagnosed with Neuroblastoma in 7/02 and is now NED. Ashley was then diagnosed with Early Onset Bipolar, ADHD and ODD. Please sign the guest book so she will have this to look back on later. Thanks for visiting!!

CANCER AND BIPOLAR BOTH SUCK!!!!!


The Strength of an Egg By
Juliet Freitag

Parents of children with cancer, or really any serious condition, are often referred to or viewed as having strength "like a rock." Albeit flattering, it isn't quite true.

It is more like the strength of an egg. An egg, you ask? Yes! If you'll think about it, you'll see my point. An egg has a polished, smooth outer appearance, with no cracks or weak spots visible. It seems almost inconceivable that the inside might not be so smooth or solid.

Most children, at some point are shown the famous egg trick. An egg set at just the right angle can withstand enormous amounts of pressure and cannot be cracked or broken. Yet the same egg, tapped gently at an ever slightly different angle, will break. The contents, once so neatly concealed, will come spilling out. The no longer perfect shell will be crushed. It looks so fragile that it seems inconceivable that it ever held any strength.

A rock, on the other hand, is solid all the way through. To break it is almost impossible. If you succeed, you will find that there is nothing inside but more rock.

It takes a lot more than pure hardness to hold the hand of hope. Parents of children with cancer are not solid all the way through. We hurt, we fear, we cry, we hope. It takes a very careful balancing act to keep the shell from being shattered. "Balancing an egg" while running a household, going for doctors' visits and hospital stays, keeping the family together, and holding on to the constantly unraveling ties of your sanity can be very tricky indeed! Occasionally, the angle will be off and the shell will break, shattering hope and all the neatly secured appearances of a truly fragile existence.

Unlike Humpty Dumpty, though, parents of kids with cancer will pick themselves up and put themselves back together again. OVER and OVER again...........




In My Daughter's Eyes
by: Martina McBride

In my daughter's eyes I am a hero
I am strong and wise and I know no fear
But the truth is plain to see
She was sent to rescue me
I see who I wanna be
In my daughter's eyes

In my daughter's eyes everyone is equal
Darkness turns to light and the world is at peace
This miracle God gave to me gives me strength when I am weak
I find reason to believe
In my daughter's eyes

And when she wraps her hand around my finger
Oh it puts a smile in my heart
Everything becomes a little clearer
I realize what life is all about
It's hangin' on when your heart has had enough
It's giving more when you feel like giving up
I've seen the light
It's in my daugter's eyes

In my daughter's eyes I can see the future
A reflection of who I am and what will be
Though she'll grow and someday leave
Maybe raise a family
When I'm gone I hope you see how happy she made me
For I'll be there
In my daughter's eyes









*HUGS* TOTAL!
give ashley more *HUGS*

Get hugs of your own







Ashley was diagnosed with Early Onset Bipolar Disorder at age 4. I am keeping this page going because of the terrible affects this has on her life.

Journal

Thursday, December 9, 2010 11:15 PM CST

Wow, Can't believe that it's been since April that I updated. Yes I can, things have been rough. The last time I updated my best friend has passed away and then two months after she passed I unexpectedly lost my mom. She had another cold that went to her lungs and while she went to the doctor one time, she never went back as she should have. Her not being able to breath caused a minor heart attack that she did not know she had. Once in the hospital they found it and got her breathing back under control and did a heart cath to see what damage or blockages there were. There had been really no change since the last time they did that procedure, the one and only artery that was open was still open. It had been one of the smaller newly created arteries that got blocked and caused the attack. So when she came home she had oxygen and was on the mend or so we thought. I left on Sunday and called her when we got back home. I got the call Tuesday afternoon at near 1pm that she had passed away that morning. She was getting dressed and only had one shoe to put on when she just fell over on the bed. My stepdad was downstairs waiting for her and when she did not return in a reasonable amount of time he went up to see her and she was already gone. It's been very very hard dealing with things with out her. She was my best friend always and we spoke several times a week. She was always there for me.

Now for Ashley, she has been doing okay. I use that loosely because we still have our share of issues. She is now seen at Vandy for her psych meds and her therapy and they did a good job. Now we are having issues with mood again and I was threatened with a fork when she got mad at me. She also got mad at school and ran from the school which earned her 2nd write up for the day and in school suspension for the remainder of the day. So I have spent a majority of my time on Ashley and fighting the school trying to get Ashley what she needs to be successful. Long hard uphill battle but I am winning slow but sure.

Ashley turned 9 last month and she is getting very big. I can't believe she is in 3rd grade already, it's amazing. I have gone from a baby with cancer to what I have today.

My health has been in question lately. I have suffered from joint and muscle pain for 20 years. Most of that time working and no insurance to do anything about it. When I did have insurance no doctor that seemed to give a damn and just through meds at me never getting to the real problem. Now i have insurance and a good doctor and we are certain of one thing, I have some form of autoimmune disease we just don't know which one. We have ruled a lot out but there are still contenders, one being lupus. That is what I think it is because everything fits. Now to add to that problem I am having issues with my BP dropping way down then I feel like crap and dizzy and very cold. So I went in today and they took it, they have me monitoring at home and going back in a week with a diary of my pressure every day. Then we will talk and do more blood work at that time. I am spending more and more time just not feeling good and hurting. I have pain pills I can take and then one NSAID that I can also take. They do help. So I keep trucking on and trying to get a job and live life. I just really want a name for the bastard so that we can stop guessing and get down to business. That would be so very nice.

Well it's time for me to take that BP and see where I am at. It feels a little low but we will see. Hopefully I will remember to get back on here and update even though I am doing this mainly for me now and no one really checks the page.

Merry Christmas to anyone that does!!

Love,

Julie n Ashley

Hospital Information:

Home

Columiba, TN

Links:

E-mail Author: tnangel01@charter.net

---

 

Your gift will help millions of people stay connected with friends and loved ones during challenging times.

---

 

This page has been viewed 20455 times.

Note: The foregoing information was authored by the patient, parent or guardian, or other parties who are solely responsible for the content. Such announcements or their content are not necessarily endorsed by CaringBridge, Inc. or any sponsoring agent.  This information does not confirm that anyone is or was actually a patient at any facility.