T-Bone

Welcome to T-Bone's web page. It is has been developed to help keep him and his family connected to their most valuable support system~you!

MISSING YOU AND LOVING YOU SO MUCH!
2/12/86 to 4/6/05


Sister Mindy, Brother Calvin and Baby T.J.

Journal

Wednesday, April 6, 2011 9:02 AM CDT

It is the hour, it is the minute 6 years ago that was to be Trent's time...time for the physical pain to end, time for a beautiful spirit to be released home. For our family it was the time that we would rejoice that Trent transitioned to his eternal home with Jesus but also the time we began our painful journey of living without him. How can a human heart hold so much grief and pain at the same time as holding so much love, gratitude and rejoicing?

Grief: it seems that this sadness is the background noise that is always there, a bit like static on the radio. A subtle crackling but you learn to listen to the music despite the static. There is familiarity and joy to be found as the music plays on though at times the static threatens to drown out even being able to recognize there is music. It seems you have lost the very connection and you search for what isn't there, seeking the what if's the what should have beens, the if only's and the go back button.

Rejoicing: At other times the music is strong, loud and clear and it brings sweet memories, hope and gratitude. The static barely audible but still there...a reminder of the connection to the source of the music. The music speaks to us in unwaivering terms, the purpose of life, the purpose of trials, the purpose of tears.

We can never put into words the gratitude to God for the gift of Trent to our lives. He lived such a great life in 19 years. He was blessed with two great siblings, a niece he adored, the best extended family you could imagine and a treasure case of friends. When I ponder the loss of Trent it is always matched by the wealth of love, compassion that God provided through our family, old friends, new friends and those even unknown to us. You remain a blessing beyond measure.

From the Book Winter Grief, Summer Grace~
I have known the blessing of sharing time on earth with another, one whom I have loved deeply. I have been enriched by by their life, and I have felt diminished by their death. I have lived it all: the laughter, the tears, the singing and the sighing, the darkness and the light. I have known how the world can change before your eyes when you lose the one you love so much. I have felt lonely and alone. Like so many others, I have been acquanited with grief. Like so many others, I have been taught the mysterious lessons of mourning. I have learned that as I release my hold, something will always remain, that as I bid farewell, someone will always abide. I have learned that love does not end~not even with death; it continues to express itself in ways ever new. I have learned when I am most alone, the Spirit of God accompanies me, when I am most afraid, the Promise of God comforts me, when I am most fragile, the Hand of God upholds me. I have begun to see that, however much I did not wish for this loss, my time of losing can also be a time of gaining. For I can come to understnd and appreciate life as I never have before. I can experience and cherish growth as I would not otherwise do. I can share what I have in ways that might not otherwise be possible. I am learning to see the ways in which I have been blessed by the God who has walked with me through the grief of winter and who accompanies me into the grace of summer's new life. (James E. Miller)

Trent's day of going home...reflection, introspection, sadness, the static threatens to drown out the music. With a small adjustment of the dial, the clarity, familiarity of the music of life returns. Our hearts are full of his love, he is with Jesus and he is with us everyday. In a blink of an eye we will see him again.

Spring is upon us, today is warm, sunny and the birds are singing just as it was six years ago. As I finish this journal entry with a chosen verse about spring, I heard a turtledove through my open window and it made me smile:

Lo, the winter is past, the rain is over and gone. The flowers appear on the earth, the time of singing has come, and the voice of the turtledove is heard in our land. ~Song of Solomon 2:11-12

As always, I will end with the three words that cover it all...
Thanks for Coming.
~Joelle and family

Hospital Information:

Truly Home!!
Heaven for Eternity

Links:

E-mail Author: jobells56@aol.com

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