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Logan was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia on August 14, 2003. He is categorized as standard risk B-Cell ALL, which studies show to have a 80% to 85% success rate. He will be in treatment for two and a half years. He is following protocol POG 9905C. So far he is doing well, except for a nasty psudemonas infection and renal failure in the Induction phase of his treatment. He has since recovered from both. Currently we are in the Delayed Intensification phase of treatment.
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 Logan's First Baseball Game!
The Limp
...Let’s get x-rays,
An MRI, a bone scan
Doesn’t look like cancer
But we’ll check his blood
L E U K E M I A
A voice on the phone says
Stretched, fast/slow, high/deep, it’s an evil voice
I can’t find the voice in my head
I’m screaming to my father, you can’t have him yet!
There’s a rush, in my brain, in my veins, to the hospital
Prep for an IV
A second attempt, then a fifth
His veins are too weak
So many voices now, such scuffling in my head
They have made miraculous progress with it these days you know
This is not a death sentence
But isn’t a sentence about death a death sentence?
My mind is sad, silly, surreal
I can’t shut it off
Blood tests, needle sticks, port implantation surgery
Liquid remedies in his mouth
Liquid poison in his veins
Little eyes plead with mine, Mom, please don’t let them hurt me
He needs blood, he needs platelets
These transfusions are safe, mostly, we hope
Don’t worry
But watch his kidneys
The chemo, the cure, can kill
Ultrasound, spinal tap, bone marrow aspiration
They are driving nails into my son
Oh God, Oh God!
Redundancy in my brain, my prayers, my pleading
Oral medication, tastes like bitter metal
Liquid poison floods his veins
Injections administered intramuscularly, intrathecally
Little eyes scream at mine,
Mom, why are you letting them hurt me!
I’m hurting my child
They are torturing my child
Oh God, please don’t let them stop
by Kelley Lozicki
as published in Candlelighters Quarterly Journal, Fall 2004
Journal
Thursday, March 8, 2007 4:48 PM CST The last time I updated this site it was December. I'm so sorry! Actually, I'd like to take a little poll. I'm thinking it might be time to bring this site to a close in April, which will be Logan's "one year off chemo" date. What do you think? Please go to the guestbook and vote, either that it's fine to say goodbye, or that you would like to see it continue.
Logan is doing quite well. He's plugging away in kindergarten, and although he struggles to keep up, he is making huge learning gains. I wonder if he'll be a struggling student all through his school career, or if it will change as he gets older? I'm sure most of his problem has to do with being sick for so long during his developmental years. But he's beginning to read now, and can write and count, so he's off and running!
Cute thing he's said lately: "Mommy, I have strep throat again. I have a horse in my neck."
Austin is graduating! (My god I feel old.)
Jozef and I are fine, busy busy as always. We are so happy to report that we can't complain!!!
Take care,
Kelley
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