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Welcome to our Patient Web Page. It has been provided to keep people updated. Journal Friday, April 18, 2008 1:37 PM CDT Hey everyone, I am sorry its been so long since I have updated. Life is just going on as usual. I have been thinking of James a lot lately. Things just remind me of him everyday. I know I will forever miss him but sometimes days are just harder than others. I miss his voice, I miss his advice, I miss his critizism and boy he would constructively critize but it was in away only James could do it and I wouldnt get upset. I miss that laugh of his I just wish I could of bottled that laugh up and when I needed a dose of James I could just hear that and it would make my day. Can you believe its been so long. I hate going back and reliving the day he died but for some reason or another that day keeps popping up in my head. There was so much love in our house that day you could just feel it. I know that I have handled the lose of my brother pretty good but there are some days that I just cant understand him not being here. It hits me to my core and paralizes me some times. So much has changed since he has been gone in my life. I graduated college I have had a professional job now for six months. I have lost a lot of weight and then I have gained it all back. I finally bought my first car. I just wished that I could of shared that with him. I know he will always be with me in spirit but sometimes I just need that flesh of my brother here in the now. I cant imagine getting married and him not there. Or when I have a child them not knowing how much a wonderful uncle they would of had. I mean I can tell them stories about him but they will never be able to get a true feeling of how wonderful he was and will always be to me. He really was my rock and one of my best friends. I could tell him anything no matter how bad or good it was and he was always there no matter what. There are days still that I dont believe it and I cant run home to my parents house and see him. Then I sit and wonder what he would be doing now. Would he be in college, or working with my dad, or just being James. I am sure that he is up in heaven just being James. He told me that he would pinch me when I wasnt doing right. Sometimes I have bruises and I just dont know where they came from ;). James I know you cant read this but I love you and miss you with every ounces of my being. Everyone thank you for everything no matter how many years past we will always remember what wonderful friends and family we had by our side through the whole journey. One day we will have a book in memory of Him that is one thing that he wanted. Links: |
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E-mail Author: ScarlettJSU@yahoo..com |
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